All I want's an explanation of just how you worked this out
'Cause it likely was illegal and expensive too, no doubt
Impaired the function of ev'ry nerve type, straight numbed 'em
You've got no reason to deny it: you've messed up real bad this time
It's quite a problem, you get these "innovations" then get tried
By fed-up juries, sick of your Jackass-grade stupidity

Walk me through the steps that you made 'cause I cannot see a straight line
Between "car's broken", "I'm late" and "let's see if this thing slides"
No good link between those parts, now you've made an absolute scene
Slammed into ev'ry damn car that happened to be on that street, oh-oh-oh
No rubber burnt, brother, no way to drive when you goddamn lack tires

I swear that e'vry time I hear from you, it's always bad, bad news
Did something crazy, God, there's only so much I can take, it's true
How are you living? The things you try are nose-bridge pinching (the things you try, the things you try, the things you try(
Oh, just one wheel was dying, this is why you have a spare for spills
But since it happened to start flattening on top of a big hill
You were totally sure that your batshit plan would work

You took your wheels of their frame even though three of them worked fine
Thought that your car would behave just like a sled, that ain't right
Kind of forgotten key parts of how those things work, I believe
Lack a flat bottom, to start, also there's no snow I can see, oh-oh-oh
No rubber burnt, brother, no way to drive when you goddamn lack tires

Ooh-ah
The phrase "no-one's that dumb" is getting taxed real hard
Whenever folks look up the madness you've pulled with your car
Driven with rear light out, not okay that you strapped
A bloody Gatorade in place, not gonna help for crap

You've made some real big mistakes where nobody came out alright
It's like you think that my brain is a piñata, not fine
I used to think you were smart but then you got behind the wheel
Replaced a wheel with a log and your latest expensive scene, oh-oh-oh
No rubber burnt, brother, no way to drive when you goddamn lack tires