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Song Parodies -> "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire"

Original Song Title:

"The Christmas Song"

Original Performer:

Nat King Cole

Parody Song Title:

"Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire"

Parody Written by:

Mick Terry

The Lyrics

Inspired by real events wherein a roommate, trying to impress a date, left the fireplace screen open, setting the living room carpet on fire (twice). Although a straight-A student, he sometimes did not think too wisely (or learn too quickly).
CHESTNUTS ROASTING ON AN OPEN FIRE,
The fire screen should have been kept closed.
But open flames tend to shoot so much higher
and sparks jump out where they're exposed.

Not ev'rybody knows some turkey's bringing mistletoe,
trying to kiss some girl tonight.
His lame plans are what ev'ry girl knows
will keep him more alone, despite.

They know it's such an old cliché
like, "How can Santa's reindeer fly with all that weight?"
Yet, ev'ry simple mind is going to try,
when she says, "No", he's got to go and ask, "Why?"

And so, it's time to get back to the case
of fire screens not put into use.
Just so it won't spread to your carpet and drapes,
keep your Christmas fool- proof.
Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire
as sung by Blond Chitlin' Goldstein
Copyright © 2011 MickTerry.com
Parody of The Christmas Song sung by Nat King Cole,
original lyrics & music written by Mel Tormé Copyright © 1944

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
 1
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 4   0
 5
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 5   6
 0
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Haley Newell - September 24, 2014 - Report this comment
You could say, "Hot stuff". But then, I wouldn't.
Sandy Clara - June 03, 2015 - Report this comment
Liked the double entendre use of "turkey", but this song did not catch on fire for me.
Nutty Bird - October 05, 2017 - Report this comment
HOT DOGS ROASTING ON A LITTLE FIRE,MAMA MADE HOT COCOA,UNCLE BOB ON THE BABY GRAND,KIDS PLAYING THE GAME CLUE,PAUL E. PARROTS,GOSE HO HO HO,ITS GOOD TO BE INDOORS,BLZIZARD HAS SNOWED US IN,BUT HAVE LOADED WOOD BIN

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