Gloat, Brangelina, simper, simper
Flaunt, Brangelina, glitter, glitter
By hard work you came a long way
With sheer talent, not the wrong way.
Shine, little Oscar, sparkle, sparkle
You induce a maudlin snarkle
You're sincere - none else above
And totally in love.

Gloat, Brangelina, light our fire
Glow on the fiber optic wire
Glow for the lowly of the species
Turn on the TV and the PC.
Mankind could use a little shamin'
For bein' stingy, do some blamin'
When you oughta gloat, you gotta gloat
Gloat, Brangelina, gloat.

Blow, Brangelina, blow your own horn
Make all the headlines on the next morn
Though "Gravity" got most the honors
You were the real toast of the Oscars
See how the camera zeroes on you
The media is sure to fawn you
This time the Oscars is your show
Blow your own horn, now, blow.

Gloat, Brangelina, keep on breeding
You're the ideal the country's needing
America's all man and woman
Feminism died with Betty Friedan
You're good examples for the nation
Though you're shacked up and dumped Ms Aniston
I want a gal like your gal so -
Gloat, Brangelina, gloat.