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Song Parodies -> "Constant Foaminess"

Original Song Title:

"Modern Loneliness"

Original Performer:

Lauv

Parody Song Title:

"Constant Foaminess"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

When I order a cup of coffee, I want a cup of coffee, not a dribble of coffee in a full cup of bubbles!
All I wanted was a cup of coffee
With nothin' complex, not me to fill it full of stuff
Just milk and sugar and, of course, those brown beans
Without those little brown beans, the point of it's been junked
So why must I have my drink constantly screwed up?
Don't like this type of swill, have it redone
I've not been vague 'bout the problem
My issue is the drought that you bring out

Constant foaminess, the liquid is low, it's simply a mess, yeah
Didn't ask for this, not gonna get much of a boost from this, yeah
La-di-da-di-da, attempt number ten, I've seen more when I piss, so
Constant foaminess, it's not what I like, how is that so friggin' hard now?

I'm thinkin' of the multitude of reasons
You could give for eekin' out the barest cup
Some policy for foam ratio that's gone
And left you kinda hamstrung, it's not your fault this sucks
But I'd still like a nice, delicious coffee cup
Then I'd imbibe to wake my dead ass up
Is there caffeine in the frothed mess?
I didn't think so, stop, I want it gone

Constant foaminess, the fluid is low, could call it depressed, yeah
Can relate to it 'cause my pep is gone, I wanna be livid
La-di-da-di-da, my energy left so it's hard to be pissed, yeah
Constant foaminess, number twenty-five but what I want's still not here now, now, now, now
Now, now, how can it be so hard now, now, now, now?
Now, now, what I want's still not here now, now, now, now
Now, now, how can it be so hard now, now, now, now?
Now, now, what I want's still not here now

Constant foaminess, I get it, I know I look like a dick, yeah
That one kind of prick who knows what they want, won't rest 'til he gets it
La-di-da-di-da, I'm sure I'd be miffed if I was behind this, though
Constant foaminess, won't fill it up high so I'm bringin' ev'ryone down, down, down, down
Down, down, why must you leave my drink down, down, down, down?
Down, down, as such you're bringin' me down, down, down, down (I'm freakin', I'm freakin')
Down, down, you're bringin' ev'ryone down, down, down, down (I'm freakin' 'cause you hate my cup, I'm freakin', I'm freakin')
Down, down, how dare you bring us all down? (I'm freakin' 'cause you hate my cup)
Constant foaminess, your coffee art blows, it had to be said, yeah

This is why I don't like barista coffee. That and the foam impedes my stirring so I can't get the sugar dissolved properly.

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   13
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