I tried my first dress whan I was three,
I tucked the willy under, just to see
put it back toofar, and looked just like a cooze
now I took it off before my ma flipped her lid
but the dumbest thing that I ever did
this I regret, I became "sue"

now you might think it's quite a joke,
and I guess it scares the hell out of folk
I even use the ladies restroom too
I tape it behind me, but it gets read,
I tried a string attached to the head
behind to the belt, and looped 'er through

well mostly alone, I'd try on tights,
and mama would say they had runs, and we'd fight
she called me wussy and said oh shame
but I made a vow to the moon and the sea
that I'd have the gender surgery
and me and ma would look quite much the same

it was in gatlinburg, one hot july
when a big old cowboy found I was a guy
when my dress flung up in a do-si-do
his lunch went out, tossage
when he looked at my sausage
and horrors.. it tried to grow

well I knew that snake was my own wee thing
and I tucked it back, in that belt loop thing
but this old cowboy tried to kick my ass
he took a swing at my face, and hit my eyes
mascara flowed black, and it freaked some guys
they didn't know I was a guy and not a lass

well I know I've wrestled tougher men,
but this one here, well it just began
he realized that he was too deep into this
I pulled him closer, as he tried to jab
my hair's dippity do, well, just a dab
and I gave him one big long wet sloppy kiss

I said son, now this may be tough, but listen it's right
but if you've had enough then it's over tonight
I'll just go and get my bag
I reminded him twice, as he wiped his lips
that it wasn't so nice what's between my hips
that he had just been kissed by a transy fag

he got all choked up, and he wiped off his nose,
and we settled up by exchanging blows
and he came away with a different point of view
he said he's had a dream, of switchin to hit,
and that lil ol' kiss was just the start of all it..
and I just smiled and said whatever you do
be jill, or dawn, anything but Sue! I got that name