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Song Parodies -> "If You'd Only Had A Gun"

Original Song Title:

"If I Only Had A Brain"

Original Performer:

Harry Connick, Jr.

Parody Song Title:

"If You'd Only Had A Gun"

Parody Written by:

Sarcastic Paranoid

The Lyrics

Some people trust in their government to protect them when a mugger or a rapist comes after them or some guy goes nuts and starts shooting people. These people are also known as "idiots."
If you had something that mattered,
Your brains would not be splattered;
Your life would not be done.
With a shot to deliver,
You could keep your heart and liver,
If you'd only had a gun!

All your parts would be within you;
You'd still be a virgin, too;
Your body whole and one.
You could snap off a bullet;
You'd have kept your throat and gullet
If you'd only had a gun!

Oh, I can tell you why
You're one huge bloody spot:
It's because he had a gun and you did not;
It's something you should have got.

You would not be in such trouble
For relying on gubble-
-ment up in Washington.
Do laws now protect you?
Your whole state is derelict, too.
What you could still have--
If you'd only had a gun!
My opinion on this latest massacre at Virginia? Well, I'd say Scott Stantis has the final word on that. Eventually, something else will drive all this over-analysis from the headlines and we'll never hear about it again until the next massacre.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 20

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   17
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