I am the very model of a modern educationist
Move past impasse; connect with class; no doubt, world's best relationist
I've one technique that's quite unique: Of new words, I'm creationist
I make up nonsense ditties, diddle-um-um-diddlationist
But does it fit? I must admit it comes out quite atrociously
Yet, children like its sound; I've found they pound on it ferociously
But does it *work*? ... Got it!
They love its flow, and so they go; all grades, they pass promotiously
It's such a charge; vocab, enlarge; words, sesqui-pe-dalia'stic'lly
Don't mean to boast, but I'm the most skilled 'mong the world, scholastic'lly
Where former, fail, success, prevail; their lives, improving drastic'lly
They study night and day, not play, to get it right, devociously
They zoom through school, not one, a fool; the opposite: precociously
They stay on track and get the knack; no one's held back, demotiously
They're all so proud! They sing out loud, the whole crowd, so commociously!
In short, for words nonsensical, I find myself propensical
They conjugate verbs tensical, and soon, they'll all be Mensacal™
I had a kid whose father did things cruel; for poor speech, punishment
He'd pain, impose, and tweak his nose; for speaking weak, admunishment
And then one day, Dad heard him say a word that caused astunishment
Pop changed his ways; now, showers praise; so stunning: son's accumplishment!
Was he beguiled, as his child's speech grew from simplistical!
Did long accept a son, inept; his thinking, fatalistical
The boy would rather not have father peeved and pessimistical
The old man was thrilled. How to describe that? .... Got it!
He floored his Dad by what he said; was feted: feats, linguistical
Now grown and gone, great crowds, he's drawn, whenever he goes traveling
They're all amazed! Completely dazed as long phrase, he's unraveling
Whene'er they heard his special word, thought: at it, they would have a fling
Dad: ne'er believe his kid could weave words longer than one syllable
Wished from his heart for child, smart, but thought that unfulfillable
I proved Pop wrong! My special song makes language skill instillable!
(One downside: shocked, when Pop got docked for tutor's hours, billable)
In short, with pride, he cruised worldwide, and ev'rywhere he ever went
With "Supercal...." for rationale, all said, "There goes a clever gent"!
With dukes and maharajas, now, he passes time majestic'lly
To leaders 'round the world, renowned, both foreign and domestic'lly
So sought is he to take some tea, 'mong guests, the most requested: he
Can say it backwards! Never lack words! So, at their behest, did he!
Some think: too far, gone; that's bizarre; to use this word so playfully
Does tongue, cat grip? Can toss a quip and never slip, dismayfully
This word, he'll summon; up 'n come an-other one, most faithfully
Uses unusual words .... Got it!
With lexicon original, he'll never speak clichéfully!
Be careful how you use it, or you'll find yourself: state, marital
Could change your life, attracting wife; be sure that you can bear it all
Is she your Hon? Or is she one who really doesn't care at all?
Since now you know the benefits, speak superfragilistic'lly
It's proven true that those who do are better off, statistic'lly
Fine thing it is, to be a whiz; folks view you almost mystic'lly
Make good impression: your expression; use words stylistic'lly
In short, important: word assortment. Or, to say more basic'lly,
[A reader approaches the turtle, and asks:]
Can you sing that while sounding like Julie Andrews?
[The turtle turns to the Admin, and says:]
Chucky! Pull up "Mary Poppins", then press "Play"!
[repeat entire song, with turtle expanding his baritone up to
falsetto, to match Andrews' four-octave range.]