This parody's a neologist's golden opportunity
To fit the scheme, OK to dream up new words with impunity
Need never fear critique severe from members of community
Like "blowing whistle", doing this'll grant complete immunity

Your wish: stand out? You must hand out a grand bout, so sensational
By end of line, a rhyme, must find; be quite imaginational
That's not a word? Abjure; absurd? Contraire, it's inspirational

[pause, then continue, speaking]
Set an example for people with your masterwork? ... Got it!

[resume singing]
Exhibit erudition there; edition, educational

Some say it's silly? Fits the bill! Cre-ate your own new lexicon
Forget the borders! Swim those warters! Words: like wetback Mexicon
And deeply ponder 2-entendre. Censor? Vex with sexy con!

Of course, no crime to force a rhyme! Use magic of great magnitude
Pay no attention to convention; 'dopt a Spiro Agnitude
(Or maybe fix on Richard Nixon; hush it up with gagnitude)
Your vast success will, all, impress, and earn you bags of bragnitude

In short, it's motivational to not be limitational
So crank up your creational with wit improvisational

Dig hole and bury dictionary; *you're* your own authority
You get to choose what words you use; ignore the mass majority
But if some joker, mediocre, pans your pert parorody
Just pay no heed to cretin's creed; abhor peeps' poor pejority

It's lots of fun to be the one who chooses words: decider, you
Cast off those fetters! Play with letters! Pooh, if they derider you!
Some hopeless hack will show his lack: grey matter, if decried, are you

[pause, then continue, speaking]
Spurn critics of wordplay ... Got it!

[resume singing]
Slough off the jerk who scorns your work; I say that bona fide, are you

Run out, have we: rhymes, syll'bles, three? Expand a "two" or squeeze a "four"
Stand tall and proud! Go show the crowd some words they never sees 'afore
Like "Antidisestalishmentarne'logism". Please and score!

You: "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" fan?
Knew mo' no better? Ultra-lettered TT: quite precocious plan [1...]
Me: Microscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis man [,,,1]
The longest word you've ever heard! Who cares if it's atrocious scan?

In short, don't shorten up your sport by letting rules, your fun, abort
So break away; it makes your day to pen a ton of pun, a forte [2]

Vid': "Words Gone Wild"! Smartly styled, craft your draft creaciously [3]
A pox upon who Unabombs your page with Ones, defaciously
But I predict, if words you picked: not chosen too salaciously
That you'll enthral, and comments, all, will Five you very graciously

I'm sure, by here, idear is clear: No real words work? Just make 'em up!
The alphabet is nice; like dice, drop in a can an' shake 'em up!
It doesn't fit where you need split? Pick where you like, 'n break 'em up!

[pause, then continue, speaking]
Carve it any way you wish? ... Got it!

[resume singing]
Think: molding clay: you shape *your* way; like cake, you bake, 'n fake 'em up!

I hope by now, you've seen, and how!: The truth: self-evidentical
Go let 'em rip! Escape the grip of habits old, tyrentical
Expand your range and make the change; path prob'ly permanentical

This argument has precedent; examples, undeniacal
There's lots of spins where wordplay wins; a trend that's undefiacal
It ain't no jive! Look through ar-chive: consists: twists, long histiacal
To lose "word virtue" will not hurt you. Loose? Nymphomaniacal!

In short, your mind, rove yonder, must; whet wit with words writ: wanderlust
Your readers, rend responderous; this golden chance, don't squander thus!

[A reader approaches the turtle, and says:]
I'll bet you can't make up a new word to describe the sales pitch of someone who sells both pistols and musical instruments!

[The turtle thinks for a moment or two, then replies:]
Of course I can! (clears throat) "Glock'nspiel" [4]




[1] (spans across two lines) "pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis" ("knew-mo'-no" = pneumono-, "Ultra" = -ultra)
Real or fake? (*Never* ask a woman that!) Take your pick:

"an obscure term ostensibly referring to a lung disease caused by silica dust, sometimes cited as one of the longest words in the English language"

"supposedly the longest word in a dictionary, an artificial word said to mean a lung disease caused by the inhalation of silica dust"

Oxford English Dictionary: "A facetious word alleged to mean 'a lung disease caused by the inhalation of very fine silica dust' but occurring chiefly as an instance of a very long word."

Teensy pun inside: "Ultra-lettered", with "lettered" in the sense of "educated, learned" (cough), but also that the word in question is "ultra-lettered", i. e., having far more letters than normal or average..

[2] Often pronounced in a way formerly considered incorrect, as in "forty" (40) or "fortay". When referring to your strong points, it was pronounced the same as "fort" (Knox, e. g.), but has evolved over time:
"In the sense of a person's strong point (He draws well, but sculpture is his forte), the older and historical pronunciation of forte is the one-syllable, [fohrt]. The word is derived from the French word fort, "strong." A two-syllable pronunciation [fawr-tey] is increasingly heard, especially from younger educated speakers, perhaps owing to confusion with the musical term forte, pronounced in English as [fawr-tey] and in Italian as [fawr-te]. Both the one- and two-syllable pronunciations of forte are now considered standard."

("pun a forte" also homage to TOS's reference to "that infernal nonsense, Pinafore".)

[3] Hey! We could sell a series of videos of our neologistic parodies, and blow right past that "Girls Gone Wild" series! Surely more people would want to see clever wordsmithery in action than to see a bunch of hot, drunk college chicks in "action", doing ... n/m, probably not such a good idea after all. :-(

[4] "Glock" - an Austrian brand of pistol. If you DK "spiel" or "glockenspiel", look 'em up. ;)