Mail-House Schlock

Kragen is sellin' car parts; gotta send junk mail,
To let the recipients know what is for sale.
An overpriced, upscale outfit's sellin' kids' swings.
They've gotta entice customers to buy these things,
With schlock�sendin' out bulk-mail schlock.
Every mailbox on my whole "sell" block
Is crammed full of this mail-house schlock.

Selmer's trying to sell me a saxophone,
Even though I am completely deaf of tone.
The firm from Troy* is selling toys and pots and pans.
This must really be pissin' off the mailman,
This schlock�he's gotta tote this schlock.
Every mailbox on my whole "sell" block
Is crammed full of this mail-house schlock.

One day when I got my 47th piece,
I realized this mailturd is killin' the trees.
I thought, I sure do hate all these damn companies.
I wish there was some way I could make them cease
This schlock�sendin' me all this schlock.
Every mailbox on my whole "sell" block
Is crammed full of this mail-house schlock.

The mail sack must feel like it is full of stones
The mailman must be herniatin' his backbone.
Some of these catalogs�big as "Vanity Fair"�
Why did they send me one on maternity care?
This schlock�don't want cheese in a crock!
Every mailbox on my whole "sell" block
Is crammed full of this mail-house schlock.

Here's a piece with a $500 rake.
This one's tryin' to vend me some oil of snake.
Here's one from the NBA sellin' Knicks tix�
Problem is, I live in California sticks.
We got jocks! But the Warriors suck!
So, on every firm, I wish a pox
For never-ending mail-house schlock,
Never-ending mail-house schlock,
Never-ending mail-house schlock. . . .