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Song Parodies -> "Ankhs Are a Mystery"

Original Song Title:

"Thanks for the Memory"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bob Hope

Parody Song Title:

"Ankhs Are a Mystery"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Ankhs are a mystery.
From pharaohs’’ ancient time, fashioned with a line
that goes across the top and loops like a lariat twine—
how lovely it is.

Ankhs are a mystery.
In clay they’re set like runes; were they used in tunes
ff hieroglyphs? in sand that shifts in burning desert ru’ns.
How hot it still is.

Egyptologists have seen them,
but still they cannot understand them.
What’s meant is absent, so they land in
what is just one big conundrum.

So Ankhs are a mystery.
Of sunburned ancient lore from the days of yore:
that sun will make your headache as beneath it you explore.
But Ankhs, they mean what?

Ankhs are a mystery.
Were they once used in verse? And things could be worse:
they could be malbeseechings in an evil mummy’s curse.
Unlucky, if that.

Ankhs are a mystery.
Of many there’s a trace in this desert place.
Linguists are stumped ’cause they’ve been trumped. . .hieroglyphics have case?
How it’s bugging them.

They wonder: might they be hie[ratic] calls
to just the august of their peoples,
in pyramids pointed like steeples.
It’s clear as must, beneath the dust.

So, Ankhs are a mystery.
The tombs say, “Entrez-vous” to the science crew
but say, “Tut-tut!” to plunderers who artifacts accrue.
Two plump plunderers, Hosni, Morsi, got an “Adieu,
And Ankh you so much!”

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   1
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User Comments

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Lifeliver - July 12, 2013 - Report this comment
My pick of the ones I've looked at so far. Inspired JAB at his best, and that's saying something. Few could have come up with this thematic match, and even some contemp. refs woven in. I even lashed out with a trio of fives. Awww, I ain't such a bad guy ...
Patrick - July 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Just finished watching a PBS documentary on Ancient Egypt, so this one resonates.

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