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Song Parodies -> "Star's Pellet Mallets Russia"

Original Song Title:

"Stars Fell on Alabama"

Original Performer:

Billie Holiday

Parody Song Title:

"Star's Pellet Mallets Russia"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

TOS portrayed a romantic situation based on a book of the same name that recounted the immense meteor shower of 1833. It was played by big bands in the 1930s and then recorded by many vocal artists. My parody is more an exercise in syllable-matching than an attempt at humor. The term "star's pellet" reminds us that all heavy elements were created by nuclear fusion inside massive stars that subsequently exploded as super-novas.
We lived with little drama,
In bliss, thinking shield was tight; [1]
Then star's pellet mallets Russia past bright. [2]

I can't forget that rush hour. [3]
Clear skies swelled, portending light;
Then star's pellet mallets Russia, casts fright.

I never scanned dawn sky with such elation.
As it grew, raced on o'er heaven free,
In scary band, [4] aglow one pellet ventured,
As kin last centur-y blew down trees near. [5]

Sky-dart beat like a chrusher [6]
To harm, pound the ground with blight,
As star's pellet challenged Russia's vast might.

[1] i.e., protection by the atmosphere
[2] Witnesses said its explosion was brighter than the sun.
[3] Many dash-cams recorded the early-morning event.
[4] Refers to its very long contrail.
[5] Refers to the 1908 Tunguska meteor strike in Siberia.
[6] The hypersonic shock wave caused widespread damage.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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John Barry - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
Up in the sky: it's a bird, it's a plane. . . .
Barry J. Mitchel - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
Thanks, JB. In line 1, I'd change "drama" to "fussin'" and "Russia past" to "Russians, blasts" in line 3 to match the internal rhyme found in TOS.
Old Man Ribber - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
BJM - Great tune and a finer parody. The last time a major meteor struck the Earth, didn't it cause the cancellation of Dinah Shore? ;D
AFW - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
right on top of the news, here..great job
Barry J. Mitchel - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
Thanks, OMR & AFW. Astronomy once was one of my amateur obsessions.
John Lomain - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
Amazingly written`
Barry J. Mitchel - February 19, 2013 - Report this comment
JL: Be careful; my ego may explode like that meteor, then descend in pieces!
In line 8, I'd change "raced on o'er heaven" to "raced on, soared heavens" because not even Icarus flew above Heaven.

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