Do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do

I've packed and I've folded, I'm smiling,
I'm leaving for Europe, and I leave today,
Bound for various locations,
I've got reservations
In hotels from Spain to Italy,
And I'll travel 'round like the tourists do,
Do everything they always do,
Snapping photos, too,
See the sights I'm told to go to,
Won't stop 'til the tour guide is all through.

So I catch the Concorde, go to London, August 1st,
Ride a double-decker at the airport that's the worst,
Heathrow ain't the best place you can stay,
But it gets you to where you wanna play.

I've gone somewhere else,
To get away from... boring-ass office life, baby, baby,
I've gone somewhere else,
So just make sure that my plants... don't diiiie.

Do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do

Now, I was told, when in Rome,
Not to do what I would do if I was home,
So I took a little trip there,
It's the place where
You can see the Pope up on his feet,
And the Coliseum, it's the building falling down across the street,
My gondolier
Was too drunk too be driving in Venice and just couldn't stop
And then we bumped up against a building on the left
And then we bumped again, and we bumped again,
I said, "How'd you get your license to be driving one of these fancy kayaks,"
And the guy just looked up and slurred,
Some crap in Italian.

I've gone somewhere else
To get to see some... foreigner's daily life, baby, baby,
I've gone somewhere else,
And I'll send you a postcard... (yeah riiiight!)

I believed when the odor hit my nose
I'd reached Germany; but soon I would see that
Smell of cheese that had caused me woes
(And was so strong that it made me cry),
Wasn't from dairy farms, but from some guy
In Paris who waved to say hi...

And when my plane came in to Amsterdam airport,
The red lights, they glowed in the city,
I fought off the urge to go outside,
(For all five minutes--yeah, I lied!)
This girl who was wearing a see-through dress
Was the most-dressed, I must confess,
My buddies at home would've been impressed
To see the kind of stuff that I saw at Oktoberfest

A hundred bar fights,
And noses broken,
And the white lederhosen legs
(Just a million now!)

Feel myself getting kinda down,
I stopped, visited Dachau... oh no,
But it won't ruin my time,
I've got my Kodak loaded up with smiles
And everything's alright, except...

I've got nothing left... to see or do here, twice.
Baby, I've got nothing left, I guess I'll have to say...
Au revoiiiir... adioooos... Auf Wiederseeeehen...
Good-byyyye!

Do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do

This guy was old, I had rolled,
He was passed out in Dublin in the cold
And I wish I could get back there, someday, back there,
Where there's pubs on every roooooooad...

Do do do, do-do-do-do, do do do, do-do-do-do, (I went somewhere else...) do do do, do-do-do-do...