Don't!
Know!

When you pop a cartridge in, the game'll buffer
Loadin' up the plot, it's thin, but you're not bothered
No, your noggin's clogged up with the open option
Character's name is blank and so your fingers are all pausin'
Well, sure, there's not a clock to push you to continue
Can sit on your bottom, ruse on what to pick, true
Lots of crossin' off the huge names, they won't fit, dude
Real name's so appealin' but obvious, shoot
I sympathise, I don't wanna use mine either
But I can't lie and say I like the
Stock default names, not awful, they're fine, but
Wanna have a personal touch to my magic fighter

Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Want to pick but all the options can't be broader

"Steve" in fantasy? Could say that seems a big mess
But then one could believe this text:
Disconnect could relieve one from big stress
From obscene worlds, need that big lift
Work out the best lore-wise? I don't know how
Can't change on a quick whim once I choose now
You're stuck, log out? Screw that now, wow
Won't lose progress to find out that right now
Go random? That's the easy option
Go random? What a load of bollocks
Go random? Stop it, look, the problem
You will see that happiness won't be comin'

Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Oh, oh, yeah
Can't give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Brain will flip on ev'ry random choice it offers

Should it be a ref'rence to a film series
That I really like? Somethin' from TV?
Should I switch it up and name my poor PC
The same name as the main bad guy? Should be weird to see
My chosen love int'rest that trusts me
Have one sappy line, says she loves me
Then her mood goes darker, watch her just seethe
Curses and fumes at some "Grog" who's not me
Since I'm the giver of names, must consider
Screwin' up attempted thrillers
Is that what I'm wantin'? Cause my inner
Critic's havin' the mother of all shivers

Can't give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Know they have no proper feelings, still feel awful

Been stuck on this spot since I don't know just how long
Guess I oughtta stop messin' around and log on
Should just call him Bob, forget my stupid drama
But I can't be a sap and give up, feel like this guy's father
Should've jotted lots of names before all this, dude
Pick a nom de plot from a pre-written list, true
Save a lot of thoughts and lookin' like a thick dude
Needin' one with meanin'? Can't on-spot pick, true
I'm lookin' knives at any and ev'ry writer
Who find no tries needed to find a
Name for ev'ry pixel blob fighter
Without doin' what I do and pull a damn all-nighter

Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name, give 'em a name, give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now
Can't give 'em a name now
Give 'em a name now