The pain in the stomach is a sign that is clear
Get to the bathroom before you lose that big rear
A big load of gas says you've got another thing coming
The tacos you had will bring the messy attack

I told you that the toilet in the bathroom will SAVE your pants
You defied my suggestion so look at the MESS you've made
BAAAAAAAD

No More Turds
No More Turds
No More Turds
No More Turds

Another pain approaches as the night closes in
The rumble goes on, go sit on the tin

Another pair wasted, I ask you when you'll LEARN your lesson
Patience is not one of your butt's virtues, so CHANGE your pants NOOOOOW

No More Turds
No More Turds
No More Turds
No More Turds

So now that the pain's coming back, what will you do
You get your butt in the bathroom before you make big poo
You listen to me or bad things will happen
So go send that turd to his all-brand new den

Thank God you finally took my advice BUT the toilet's clogged
Get the dadgum plunger before that monster escapes BACK in here NOOOOOOW

No More Turds
No More Turds
No More Turds
No More Turds