A fella chose a gal for his wife
She was blonde, with massive mounds, an’ he was satisfied
An’ for a baby they would try
Well, you could've seen that man wasn’t bored
An’ she ceased to flow from down there after goes galore
An’ even though, she wasn’t sure
She went to see the doctor guy…the confirmation made her cry
She kept blubbin’ on…didn’t stop till dawn
Then they rang the kin…went out for a meal
I'm told that I was named by the uncle I adore
A fusion of the cells led to something real
He cried a lake, an’ so did she, when their first son was born
I was really big…she was really torn

Then at twenty-four the time was right
To settle down an’ buy a house, an’ make a tiny mite
I swore to take the marriage vow
She was fair; I’d had some luck with a lady who was Dutch
Gave up so many things, an’ one of them was porn
I was overjoyed when we wed in Tiel
My love has never waned an’ that gal I still adore
A fusion of our cells led to something real
I cried a lake, an’ so did she, when our first son was born
He was really big…she was really torn…torn

I’m eighty now; a useless guy…my motivation has run dry
I can’t carry on…nothin's tight: I’m worn
I'm all out of breath…I’ve got no more zeal
I'm old an’ I am dazed…will I make it: I’m not sure
Confusion ever reigns…this is all too real
I’ll try to wait so I can see jus’ one more sky at dawn
Nearly out of life…soon the bells’ll peal
An’ then I’ll be interred…wife’ll blubber on, for sure
Soon to be “the late”…then she’s gonna mourn…mourn