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Song Parodies -> "Kent Justice!"

Original Song Title:

"U Can't Touch This"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

MC Hammer

Parody Song Title:

"Kent Justice!"

Parody Written by:

Jo Cordery

The Lyrics

When I was younger I never used to know that the words were 'U can't touch this', I used to sing 'Kent Justice!', and imagine a judge in a wig singing it in court! After realising my mistake, I listened to the lyrics of the whole song to try and work out what MC Hammer was saying, but I couldn't. I came up with these lyrics as a result. The best way to appreciate these lyrics, I think, is to listen to the song as you read them so you can hear for yourself what MC Hammer sounds like he is saying!
Kent Justice!

Kent Justice! x4

My my my my music hates me so hard
Makes me say oh my lord
Thankyou for blessing me
With a mind to rhyme and to hate fear
It feels good when you know you're down
I superglue homework from the old town
And I'm known as such
That this is a beat, uh, you can't touch

I told you home boy
Kent Justice
Yeah, that's how we're living and you know
Kent Justice
Look in my eyes man
Kent Justice
Here, let me bust that funky lyrics

Fresh new kicks and pants
You got them like that
Now you know you wanna dance
So move outta your seat
And get a fly girl and testes feet
While it's rolling hold on
Pull a little bigger and let the noise Goldblum
Like that, like that
Put on my britches and fold one back
Let them know that you're too much
And this is a beat, uh, they can't touch

Yo, I told you
Kent Justice
Why you standing there man?
Kent Justice
Yo, sound the bail, school's in supper
Kent Justice

Give me a song or rhythm
Making them stret
That's what I'm giving them now
They know they talk about a him
When they're talkin' 'bout a show
That's hyped, and typed
Singles are small
Some basket bought whiteboard tape
Two nerds, one's got a chick
And a nice new bird that charts
The chick, either work hard or you might as well quit

That's worm because you know
Kent Justice x2
Break it down
(Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)
Stop. Hammer time

Going with the floor, it is said
If you can't drew the nest
Than you're probably all dead
So weigh your hands in the air
Bust few moos
Run your fingers through your hair
Through zit, for a wing, now gas two bats
And you're gonna get better
Move, slide your rump
Just for a minute lets all do the bump
(Bump, bump, bump, yeah)

Kent Justice
Look man
Kent justice
You'll probably get a height boy, cos you know you can't
Kent Justice
Bring the bail, school's back in
Break it down
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)
Stop. Hammer time

Every time you see me
The hand was just so hype
I don't wobble forth
And a magic on the mic
Now why would I ever stop doing this?
With upwards stinking records
That just don't hit
I've tootled round the world
From London to da Bain
It's Hammer go, Hammer hits the Hammer, yo Hammer,
And the rest can go and play

Kent Justice x3

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.4
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   2
 2
 2
 
 5   2
 2
 2
 

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