Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Pants"

Original Song Title:

"Hands"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Jewel

Parody Song Title:

"Pants"

Parody Written by:

Hindibunni

The Lyrics

The chorus, of course, inspired by Cartman.
If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be to eat at BK
And not to diet 'cause diets are tasteless
And useless for folks like me

I won't be losing weight
I won't be slimmer by July
I will bury myself in fries and shakes
For starving is not worth the try

My pants are large, I know
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
And I'm a little swollen

Slim-Fast plan for two meals a day
It didn't trim your waistline
And then I used Metabolife
'Til I saw that exposé on Dateline

Take a bite, a sip of your Sprite
Forget about things fat-free and lite
'Cause where there's a meal to super-size
There we shall go dining

My pants are large, I know
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
And now my zipper's broken

In the end everyone gets fatter
In the end everyone gets fatter

I will order extra cheese, and I will pay
I will order extra cheese, and I will pay
I will order extra cheese, and I will pay

My pants are large, I know
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
And now I think I'm chokin'

My pants are large, I know
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
But I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned
And I'm a little swollen
We are slightly swollen

We have big thighs
Big pants
Big butts
We have big thighs
Big pants
Big chins
We have big thighs
Big pants
Big thighs
We have big pants
We have big pants

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 1
 1
 
 5   3
 2
 2
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Mr. X - February 10, 2004 - Report this comment
I thought it was great; I give it a perfect score.
Steven - January 22, 2008 - Report this comment
I love the original but I love this one more! So funny. Totally perfect.
littleCupCakes - January 22, 2008 - Report this comment
555 for losing a few pounds . . . Now I'm off to my date with Mr " StairMaster ", the bun masher!!!

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/90s/jewel5.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1546