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Song Parodies -> "Bad Barber Again"

Original Song Title:

"Together Again"

Original Performer:

Janet Jackson

Parody Song Title:

"Bad Barber Again"

Parody Written by:

Below Average Dave

The Lyrics

I'm at
There are times when I check the mirror and cry
There are times when I question rather he is licensed
I'll never forgive my barber
(I'll never forgive you)

Hair got long so I headed to a salon
But something's wrong cause ev'ryone around me's laughing
They all just started laughing

Turns out most of my hair is gone--What is left
It Shoots straight out in five quite different directions
It just might hurt you buddy

I will never go back there my friend
I hope this don't start a new trend, buddy
I'll never trust that one again 'cause

Every strand is red
Like I bled all week
and these pony tails
Don't look right you'll see
Watch out or he might
Make your fam'ly freak
Wish that darn barber
hadn't worked on me

(No never again ooh )
He made brand new split ends
(No never again )
I think he cut my head
(No Never again ooh)
I stood out in crowds
(No Never again ohh)
I'll try someone new

So I tried someone new the next week
I passed out
When I woke my hair was covered up in bright blue spikeys
Thick rock hard bright blue spikeys
I stood up and I heard someone
Scream in pain
They touched me and now they're bleeding badly
They shouldn't have touched the spikeys

I tried to wash it again and again
Then I tried to mix blonde colors in lordy
but as I tried lost my fingers and limbs 'and

My head it now glows
Like a Christmas Tree
Colors fill my hair
Makes me look crazy
Like a disco light
My head shines brightly
It's like a Skittles bag
Exploded on me

(How did this happen ooh )
The spikes were nailed in
(How did this happen ooh )
It gives off quite a stench
(How did this happen ooh)
Wanted something bold
(How did this happen)
This ain't what I meant!

Took a razor like Britney straight to my head
The damn thing broke and the police said it was a weapon
Yes my hair is now a weapon

What I'd do just to have my hair
Back again
My head is feeling really heavy lately
I need a hack saw frankly

Tried ev'ry knife I own
Sandpaper was too weak
Dulled it with my hair
I'll try gasoline
Do you have a light
Flames are bringing heat
Thought I might be scarred
Bad hair's still on me
This has been a Below Average Dave Production, All Rights reserved

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   15

User Comments

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Matthias - February 17, 2009 - Report this comment
This was hilarious!!! A tough one to beat I think you might have it in the bag with not only this Artist but a worthy contender for SOTM. Good job Dave. Watch out for the spikeys!!!
NorCALCupCakes - February 17, 2009 - Report this comment
Sir B+A+D, this is ~~CABO- -WABO ~~ for sure! This Rocks ! ! It is definitely up with ~TIRE MUNCHER ~, Sir, I love it!
2Eagle - February 17, 2009 - Report this comment
Quite an effort. If only computers could cut hair.
Below Average Dave - February 18, 2009 - Report this comment
Thank you Matty, CupCakes and 2Eagle. . .fun one to do.
Mark Scotti - February 18, 2009 - Report this comment
That's a great one, B.A.D. Very "Cutting" edge....
Below Average Dave - February 18, 2009 - Report this comment
Thank you Mark Scotti
LittleHOcut - February 18, 2009 - Report this comment
Sir B+A+D, . . . . perhaps a MOhawk will solve your problem, Sir Dave ? ?
Below Average Dave - February 18, 2009 - Report this comment
LOL, thanks LHC:)
Agrimorfee - March 06, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Very funny, "bright blue spikeys"...and the Britne reference still works...
Agrimorfee - March 06, 2009 - Report this comment
(Oops Artistry Tag, not ABC...sorry...)
kevin wrightly - March 09, 2009 - Report this comment
no knowledge of os nice name swap
Matthias - March 12, 2009 - Report this comment
Lots and lots of crazy images in this one Dave. Great job working on a really, really, really annoying song too. (Have I mentioned that I hate Janet Jackson almost as much as I hate Suzi Quatro and Bob Dylan, darn you for combining them all together in a 3 artist/ 6 week block!)
Rex - March 15, 2009 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Wonderful imagery. "Exploding Skittles", heh heh.
Jeff Reuben - March 15, 2009 - Report this comment
A hair-raising Janet tale! Can you post the pics of you after the haircuts?
bobpiecheese - March 17, 2009 - Report this comment
(Artistry) It's probably the lunatic in me, but I LOL'd really hard at 'watch out for the spikeys'. Great stuff, Dave. 555!
Phil Alexander - March 17, 2009 - Report this comment
Had to turn off the OS while reading through this one - as cliché-strewn drivel goes, it's particularly awful. But the parody is definitely a cut above that.
Claude Prez - March 19, 2009 - Report this comment
I, too, enjoyed the Skittles and the spikeys. Good job man.
Pensworth - March 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Have never heard the OS, but I'm content just knowing this one. Nice job.
Max Power - March 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Hey Baldy!
bobpiecheese - March 30, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Stuart McArthur - March 30, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) nicely done Dave (a few typos though? should "rather" be "whether"?) never mind, it raised the interesting question of whether in fact hair can be a weapon - particularly blue spikeys - a bit of cornflour and they won't be letting you on planes - 555
Arwen - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
SOTM...having had my fair share of bad experiences with stylists...(that's what we girls call makes us feel daintier...)...I feel for you on this one Dave. =) Lots of laughs!
Jeff Reuben - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Invisible Boy - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Great images, Dave. Like Claude, the Skittles and the spikeys stood out for me. Nice job...
Glen S - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Started out strong, and I like many of the subs. Lost some momentum the more I read. Spikeys were funny and I like your choices on the refrains and your use of the short lines. Watch them typos.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM - April 21, 2012 - Report this comment

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