Blame it all on my poots and liquidy toots
That ruin my white underwear
I blast when I go---I can’t stop the flow
I was aghast at what mess I saw there

What an ugly surprise, and the stench from my thighs
And the ever-widening stain
I hollered “Ew!” Spent money for something new
Now I never have to complain

Now, I’ve Depends on low places
So I don’t wreck gowns
And my rear cases those stools away
And my whiz will stay
Now I sure love an anal stasis
But I slip a lot where that old waste is
Oh, I’ve Depends in low places

Corrected a wrong, elastic is strong
And man, that thing holds a lot
Everything’s airtight, I stay out all night
I’m not running off to the pot

No drippage between, or causing a scene
It’s good for twelve hours, but then
It gets quite high, and I need a shower
But you’ll never know

That I’ve Depends on low places
So I don’t wreck gowns
And my rear cases those stools away
And my whiz will stay
Now I sure love an anal stasis
But I slip a lot where that old waste is
Oh, I’ve Depends in low places

Now somethin’ is wrong, I waited too long
I feel a rumble back there
Everything’s too tight, I think that I might
Make a big hole in this chair

Hey, I hear a rip, and feel a big drip
And I don’t think it’s just some gas
And run from the room, get a mop and a broom
Oh Lordy, no stoppin’ this ass!

I broke Depends on low places
Now I wrecked the town
As my rear chases those stools away
And my whiz won’t stay
Now I sure love an anal stasis
But I slipped a lot where that old waste is
Oh, wrecked Depends in low places