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Song Parodies -> "Domino's"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Dolly Parton

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

An Anti-Domino's Commerical that only Dolly Parton can tell it.
(Laughter at a Sorority Pizza Party)
“Call ‘em up!”
“Half sausage, half rainbow trout!”
“Shush! Shush! Shush! The phone’s ringing!”

A cross between a Pizza Hut
And the cardboard of phone books
Domino’s will taste like sh*t
But cheapness is their hook
Just bring one to your office fling
And everybody eats
Though everybody hates it
It’s better than those sheets

Eat Domino’s you lardass!
One slice and you’ll want more
The cheapness of their bargains
Let’s you eat when poor

Let’s suffice with a new slice
And we’ll avoid the Noid
Cause when we order Domino’s
Our hunger’s been destroyed

Go get the door!

Your Brooklyn-style pizza
Is Styrofoam with cheese
You can barely taste the flavor
All you taste is just the grease
Cholesterol keeps risin’
With each slice I eat
A college diet of
Burnt swiss cheese and rancid meat

(“Yowch! That’s hot!”)
On Pizza? Yick!*

With free brownies?
That makes no sense

(“Bring the tums!”)

[Pizza Boy]
It might be dry
Our pastry dough
There’s no doubt it is
I’ve got my pride and my nice ride
And got change for a ten
Want tacos? Sorry bros
But we’ve got extra cheese!

[Sorority Girl] (Pushes the Pizza Boy out of the way)
Here’s the cash, now go get lost
And don’t you upstage me!

Yeast won’t grow
And it tastes like feet

(Cheering of the Sorority Girls)
“Food Girls!”
“Stuff, stuff, stuff, stuff… Stuff your mouth!”

(“Yeah… Stuff MY mouth!”)

[Pizza Boy]
Just one more thing before I go
You forgot to give
My tip’s denied, won’t let that slide
I need to pay my rent
I suppose your low-blows
Sure have made me peeved

[Sorority Girl]
Here’s your tip, Molly the slut
You can go have fun for free

You’re bestowed
With sexy tips!


[Pizza Boy]
“Need Money!!!!
But you can strip!”

(“Damn! Here you go it’s a few dollars”)

“It is a greasy little thing, inn’it”

“What kinda cheese is this anyway?”

“I’ll tell you what. I can eat as far as the crust, but then…”

"Deep dish or hand tossed it?"

“It’s really Little Caesar’s that I crave!”

“I’m hungry enough to eat this whole pizza”


“Wish I had Papa John’s in my stomach!”

I get so bloated when I chew cheese along with all this hot Canadian bacon.
I’ll tell ya, I feel pretty gassy right now.
But then again it’s only right since I am eating from Domino’s”
* Domino's used to actually have an Oreo pizza (Of course it was a desert pizza, without the cheese and tomato sauce, but eating a regular cheese pizza topped with Oreos sounds pretty gross).

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   8

User Comments

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Max Power - May 11, 2008 - Report this comment
Taste great
Wolverine - May 12, 2008 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Absolutely freakin' Hilarious! I had a child. Lost two teeth, and they weren't even loose. You bought up painful memories, AND made me laugh at the same time.
littleCupCakes - May 13, 2008 - Report this comment
Der ~ RED BARON ~ is my favorite! Zehr Gut, Mein Herr!
Agrimorfee - May 14, 2008 - Report this comment
(Artistry) some good lines, but so many missed opps. for *great* lines. Pacing is fine (you've picked up a knack for creative dialogue replacement thanks to the Bunglepalooza project), but this seems to have been done in a hurry once again.
bobpiecheese - May 21, 2008 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Hey, I like Domino's! My favourite brand of pizza actually. Particularly the Deep Pan. Mmmm...anyways, this was pretty good. Not my fave yours, but still good.
Below Average Dave - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Pacing is good, but you must have been running out of time. This is what I meant by too many projects at once when you mentioned the Ska-idays and Mr Bungle project, my mind said "Epic 40, Artistry, Idol??" And I told you that I didn't want any more projects for that same reason. I thought you had some killer lines, and they got me laughing pretty good. The ranchid meat line was great, I never did understand the free brownies thing, Their pizza IS a lot like cardboard and overall their ingredients just aren't very good. A couple things here, Domino's is not known for low prices-in fact other than their 4-4-4 deal, they are far more expensive than their competitors (Chicken Kickers cost almost 8 bucks for like 6 kickers, comparatively Pizza Huts Bone Out Wings for 8 is about 6 dollars and Papa Johns Chicken Strips for 8 is about 6 also). I also don't understand the Molly the slut comment, because she is talking to the Pizza "Boy", why is he a slut and how'd his name end up as Molly. Still very funny, but after you get a couple of these projects done, I'd try to lower your scope to focus on less projects, as one who always gets in over his head--I can say first hand that you are in over your head right now.
Invisible Boy - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Pretty funny idea here Matty.To slam Domino's is always fun, and to change the story line at the end to open up the opportunity to start "slipping in" all of the double entendres was a good idea as well.Good job
Rex - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Nice title sub and many creative line subs.

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