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Song Parodies -> "Mr. Jones, Dentist"

Original Song Title:

"Mr. Jones"

Original Performer:

Counting Crows

Parody Song Title:

"Mr. Jones, Dentist"

Parody Written by:

Larry Hensley

The Lyrics

My dentist when I growing up was Mr. Jones, so had this parody in mind for this song for a while
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,
My tooth

I was down at the dentist today
Hygenist, this yellow-haired girl
Mr. Jones strikes up a conversation
He says “How’s your teeth feeling today?”
You know, I get a toothache when I eat rough meat
We’re gonna fix that right here
But chomp down on these bitewings now
So we can get some more x-rays

But first put on the really huge heavy vest
Ow, my tooth is still really hurting, ow
Oh no

And then he tells me
No you don’t really need a filling
Pass me the floride, Mr. Jones
Well, what flavor?
The bubble gum will do just fine
'But I don’t want to go through tooth painting

Mr. Jones, dentist
Spit sucker’s “Mr. thirsty”
Still there is the beautiful hygenist
Looking at my teeth
Hexagon pattern on ceiling
Don’t stare at the bright lights
Radio in stereo
Where Easy Listening rules
They try to make me not bored

Well, I'm gonna read magazines
They paint teeth in blue and red and black and gray
All of the beautiful colors look very strange when on your teeth
Yeah, well, you know I won’t need any braces
But I had wisdom teeth out one day
If I knew Picasso
I would make him paint a new smile for me, yay

Mr. Jones, dentist
Here it’s much less painful
Than the place before where they were sadists
They used all old tools
I don't think so
They closed later on
Don’t need orthodontist
Though he’s got free pac-man machines
Everybody loves my smile
I will never be lonely
I will never lose my teeth
And won’t need retainers, see
Oh no

My mouth’s good as a lion’s
Yeah, they moved to a new location
But it’s close to the old place now
Yeah, but for that they must have some reason
Don’t need fillings
But I came close once, needed some work
Don’t wanna get paradontal disease, no disease, no disease

Mr. Jones , dentist
Hygenist says “Must brush more”
Yeah, I stare at the beautiful mirror
Teeth perfect of course
I’ll try not to chip them when I go ski
Oh you might hear Bob Dylan
Mr. Jones wishes he was someone just a little more funky
He likes being a dentist
But he, will be there just as shortly as he can be

Mr. Jones, dentist
Starin' at the video
When I look at the television, in the waiting room
I know I’ll go in soon
We all wanna have good teeth
And they tell us why, and they tell us how
And then everybody loves me
I wanna be just smiling when happy as I can be
Mr. Jones , dentist
No, I don’t need the drill

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - January 26, 2017 - Report this comment
I once had a chiropractor named Dr. Jones who smoked pot. Maybe I should write about him... 555!
Larry Hensley - January 26, 2017 - Report this comment
Thanks Rob (that would be cool to read)
Rob Arndt - January 26, 2017 - Report this comment
Larry, Dr. Jones went to jail for false insurance claims!

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