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Song Parodies -> "Britney's Baby Loves To Dine!"

Original Song Title:

"Hit Me Baby One More Time!"

Original Performer:

Britney Spears

Parody Song Title:

"Britney's Baby Loves To Dine!"

Parody Written by:

Nib Oswald

The Lyrics

A tale about breastfeedding (with double-d's).
So greedy, baby.
So greedy, baby.

So greedy, baby. You guzzle lactose in loads.
Just suckle and imbibe there.
This greedy baby bites udders of silicone.
Knows how to gormandise, yeah.

Foamy. Mouth is loving full cream.
Swelling baby cuz he feeds and grows now.
Tired jaws.

[Britney's baby:]
“Mum's swollen breasts are filling me.
(Moustache!)
A busty chest, I will not wean.
(Til mum's drained!)
Yum high-fat tissue. Who'd use bovines?
Drink five til nine.”
Britney's baby loves to dine!

[Britney:]
“Oh greedy baby,
My cleavage is feeding you.
Soyless, suckling lite milk.
You fatty baby,
A glutton for my buxom boobs.
You're lactose tol-er-ant, kid!”

Bloating. Rounded from teat smoothies.
Swills like crazy, guzzling as mum moans ‘Ow!'
Bites and gnaws.

[Britney's baby:]
“Mum's swollen breasts are filling me.
(Bubbly!)
A busty chest, I will not wean.
(Tits still teem!)
Why would I quit now, they're oozing fine.
Simply divine!”
Britney's baby loves to dine!

Oh greedy baby
Oh greedy baby

[Britney:]
Oh greedy baby, you guzzle lactose in loads.
Oh greedy baby, my nipples down to my toes!

[Britney's baby:]
“I just request,
Acidopholous!
Why milk from a cow?
Areolas, swill this stream.
Just lose the brassiere,
Cuz it's feeding time.”
Britney's baby loves to dine!

[Britney's baby:]
“Mum's swollen breasts are filling me.
(Milk jugs!)
A busty chest, I will not wean.
(Til sixteen!)
Mammaries issued. These two are mine.
Elephantine!”
Britney's baby loves to dine!

Guys are obsessed,
With Brit's homely pecs.
Offspring now devours.
Both boobs flow pneumatic streams.
He chews. Perseveres,
To swig a milk Rhine.
Britney's baby loves to dine!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 30

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 3
 
 2   1
 1
 0
 
 3   3
 2
 1
 
 4   2
 5
 5
 
 5   22
 20
 21
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jeff Reuben - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
A few months down the road from my "Baby" parody (and my life), and we'll wind up here. "You guzzle lactose in loads" is excellent.
Anon - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Speaking as a Song Title Cop, I must inform you that the full title of the original song is "Baby One More Time." Speaking as myself, I must say that this was a clever parody, and I shall award it with a 555.
Stuart McArthur - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Who would have thought Britney's bub would be so articulate, Jake - truly inspiring - maybe Luke would love to dine next - 555
Michael Pacholek - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Shrinks are already circling the Federline home, hustling for the rights to treat Britney's baby for all the therapy it will inevitably need. And Stuart, it is surprising, considering how inarticulate Britney and her wife Kevin are.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - February 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks all! A round of pasteurised on the house.
Kristof Robertson - March 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Luke for occasionally doing an OS that an old fogey like me knows! :-) This is cheeky and clever...555
Guy - March 03, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This is no milk dud.
Scathe - March 05, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) seriously silly TMI.
Charlie Decker - March 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Man, I haven't heard the OS forever. While this parody doesn't make me want to hear it again, no parody could do that. Excellent job, 555.
Adagio - March 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, but the message of that swilling baby came through.
John Jenkins - March 12, 2005 - Report this comment
What everybody else said, plus the "bovine" line. Very clever parody, Luke.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - March 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Britney's baby one more time... :-)
I'm sure the whole family will supply parody inspiration for years to come...
Spaff.com - March 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Fave bits: "lactose tolerant" and "elephantine." You certainly milked this topic for all it's worth. Heh heh.
Johnny D - March 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) What Spaff said. Especially the "Heh heh" part.
Rex - March 20, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Hard to miss the points of this song.
Jeff Reuben - March 21, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Still good, see above!
Arwen - March 21, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM--Luke...I'd like to give you 5s, just for using the word gormandise...=)
Stuart McArthur - March 23, 2005 - Report this comment
sotm - see above comment
Claude Prez - March 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Very good; for some reason I really liked that you worked in "acidopholous". Also "teat smoothies". As always, some very clever matches to the original.
Jordan (Mike Armstrong) - March 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Disgustingly well-written. I shouldn't have eaten just before reading. good job
2nz - March 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Grotesquely and descriptively clever. Good rhymes too.
Tim Mayfield - March 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Funny stuff.
Charlie Decker - March 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Oh, no. I already voted for this in SOTM. Lightning does not strike twice, my friend. (Well, maybe it does. This song is certainly good enough for that. Wait, does that make sense? I dunno, I'm gonna have to think about it...)
Lightning Representative - April 01, 2005 - Report this comment
We have a good union.
Adagio - April 05, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-2005) DKTOS, commented above.
Charlie Decker - April 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Lightning union? Oh, I get it. Yeah, that's kinda funny I guess. Sort of.
Agrimorfee - April 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Your usual poetry, but this didn't grab me (not knowing the OS didn't help, either)
Scathe - April 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-B) Just as freaky as before.
MysteryGoat - April 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Dude this was funny!!!!
Kristof Robertson - April 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See previous comment. I can't believe there are people who DKTOS! Even prisoners in solitary confinement for 20 years know this song! Anyways, Young Mr Brattoni, this gets my vote...
Guy - April 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-B) See my earlier comments when it presented for (SOTM). I guess you are milking this for all its worth.
Stuart McArthur - April 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-05) - see above - still a good read Luke
Melhi - April 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(aBc) The way guys think about breastfeeding is always funny.
Johnny D - April 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above.
Phil Alexander - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Have to admit that this one didn't do it for me, Luke... I guess it's a matter of taste ;-)
Jeff Reuben - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Okay, now this one IS close to the heart =)
Cheezmeister - May 02, 2005 - Report this comment
==>Though in Britney's case, a good foot or so away. I can picture the baby talking in a real deep grating voice like the baby from Who Framed Roger Rabbit and just burst out laughing. I kinda couldn't get around the big words...........imbibe....acidopholous...areolas?
GRS - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Not bad ;D
Dorkweaver - August 24, 2005 - Report this comment
What a dweeb! Come here Tina you fat lard come get some dinner....
Nikki - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
I think it is very disrespectful. Britney's new baby is very innocent and a gift from God. No one deserves to have their NEWBORN baby made fun of, nor the mother. You're probably just jealous because it's not your baby.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
If you haven't noticed, I submitted this in early February. Britney wasn't even pregnant yet.
Yet Another Dutchman - October 21, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm curious. Do you really own a thesaurus (or visit dictionary.com), or do you just KNOW all the synonyms you make use of? You always match up your parody's lines extremely accurately to TOS's lines, and although I'm not a big fan of that method, you do it with such a wide scala of words and -more importantly- humorous puns, you rarely miss your goal: which is making people laugh, AmIRight? Oh... with the whole issue that started years ago of "Britney can't possibly owe that amount of chest grow to puberty" (even though everyone knows Chris Aguilera is the one who turned out Miss Implant) maybe if the baby sucking to hard, he'll end up sucking up stuff other than milk...
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 22, 2005 - Report this comment
I have to use libraries and uni for internet access, so usually it's just to type up what I've written down on notepad paper. With this one I started out by writing down all the words I could think of related to milk and breasts and them slotted them into a line if the pacing fit.

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