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Song Parodies -> "Sundries House"

Original Song Title:

"Country House"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Blur

Parody Song Title:

"Sundries House"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Ever see one of those stores that sell nothing but random bits-and-bobs that seem to have no purpose? I hope so, 'cause otherwise this premise is dead.
Now the sales pitch begins

Hey there, fella, potential spender
I can just tell that you've got a lot of money (lot of money)
You're in the right place, I'm sure you'll see
That in this pile of whatsits, you'll find somethin' perfect
It's worth the full price, maybe, I think that it's worth it (could be worth it)
Can't say that I don't have variety
Got whole crates of shit (crates of shit)
Ask "What is it?" (what is it?), I don't know, alright?

Filled up my house
Shop's just a house full of sundries
You may ask "What does that mean (ooh-ooh-ah-ooh)?
Not heard of that, please explain sundries"
Curios, trinkets, whatsits
Ephemera, random shit, those are sundries
Oh-oh, and that's all that's in my shop (ooh-ooh-ah-ooh)
All that I have got are these sundries

Wish there was a story for my weird inventory
But all the details really bore me (man, they bore me)
Let's just say: don't drink and sign deeds
So now these knick-knacks are stuck on the rack
I can't make an ad if I don't know diddly crap (does it fly? Try it)
Oh, it's a stupid mystery
Is it modern art (modern art)?
Or dead parts (dead parts)? I don't know, alright?

Come to my house (blows)
My stupid-ass House Full O' Sundries (blows hard now, so full of crap)
Please take 'em off of my chest (help me and buy)
Don't just take one, take the rest of these sundries
A pile of random crap (blows)
Hard to pay tax sellin' sundries (blows hard now, this load of crap)
Barely scrape by which sucks (I'll tell you why)
'Cause I can't just close up, stupid sundries

Bloody sundries (doo-doo-doo)
I hate sundries (doo-doo-doo)
Goddamn sundries

Blows, blows hard now
I can't sell crap, no-one will buy
Blows, blows hard now
I just feel trapped, help me and buy

Oh, get me out this house (blows)
This should-be-dead house full of sundries (blows hard now, so full of crap)
Can barely afford to eat (hunger is high)
Because what's not neat is these sundries
They're for last-damn-second gifts (blows)
To prove a character's thrift, stupid sundries (blows hard now, this load of crap)
Oh, it's doin' my brain real harm (it hurts the mind)
Can't pour on the charm sellin' sundries
Oh-oh-oh, I hate this damn house (blows)
This stupid house full of sundries (blows hard now, so full of crap)
One day, I'm sure that I'll flip (I'll snap in time)
And burn down this stupid tip full of sundries
One more douche who says "Pass" (blows)
Will eat the glass 'round the sundries (blows hard now, this load of crap)
So you'll have these? Well done (farewell, goodbye)
Sure you'll have lots of fun with these sundries
That's that, la-la

More cash for me, actor supreme

"I do sell a lot of wank, don't I?" - Franz Katzenjammer

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