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Song Parodies -> "Phone Callin' Bots"

Original Song Title:

"So What'cha Want"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Beastie Boys

Parody Song Title:

"Phone Callin' Bots"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Robocalls. Don't ya hate 'em?
Yes, that phone's me, I won't pause for that

Well, might pause a tic so that I can check the number
I doubt that it'll be anybody that important (that's right)
You know my job's fine, pay my bills on time
And no friends would call when Messenger is there, right
You ask me who I'm dismissin', no name is listed
So how can I know who they are? True, seems dismissive
Just a trend that I've dealt with for months now
Thrice a day, makes me fume, really wish they'd stop it now
There's a robot on my line
And when I pick up, the trite-ass lines flow like:
"An extended investment is the best, y'all"
Since my name's never mentioned, I get pissed, y'all
Phone callin', callin', callin' bots (robots)
They're always comin' for my money, won't piss off (piss off)
I said, "Remove all my information" tons, but
That part never gets done since they're all made of scum

Yeah, I won't answer that

Why they callin' on me? I guess I do have cash
Might be frugal, see, but I think there's a giant diff'rence (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Between savin' dollars and the way that these callers
Think I'm thicker than a brick because they ring and then they holler
Wait, that means "scream", don't know if that's what I'd call it
Voice is even all the time, no inflections, nothin'
Got spliced up lines, half-second pause a bunch
They function more like sentient Mad Libs, they're not flesh and blood
Cause otherwise I would find that they might recognise
The word "no", 'fraid they don't, not part of their A.I.
Believe me, I might be screamin' down their neck
But they're cheery, they won't respond to lawsuit threats
I hate how they're wastin' my time, not right
That's right, they're wastin' my time, brain's fried
Cause they're always wastin' my time, not right
This time, not wastin' my time

Yeah, I won't answer that

Callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Goddamn phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Aah-aahow!
Aah-aah-aahow!

The offers that they pose just aren't somethin' I'm concerned about
They're tryin' to buy me with their lies of rich turnabout (lies)
Made the choice, if I can't find it in my mind
That I know this number, not one that I recognise
I refuse to pick up, won't be a schmuck, y'all
Wish I could block them all but they refuse to fall
Damn phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Damn phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
The world is full of pricks that love to pounce
On each and ev'ry phone number they find to then hound
Until they straight eat up all of their green, but
I'm not gonna be a sucker to company greed, bud
Some point, might change to a new number if the calls do not stop
For now, I'll just ignore them, won't stop that lot
So there's a constant buzz from my pants, think cleaner, please
Robot dudes won't accrue my cash, still won't let me be

Yeah, I won't answer that

Phone callin', callin', callin' bots (callin' bots)
Phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Damn phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)
Damn phone callin', callin', callin' bots (phone callin' bots)

Hey, Bender, gonna make some noise, With your hard drive scratched by the Beastie Boys! (disc scratch) That's whatcha, whatcha, whatcha get on level five!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.7
How Funny: 3.7
Overall Rating: 3.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   2
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