If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd write you a song ( I would write you a song,
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
write you a parody for your song
(maybe a nice yesteryear or a current one)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I would write about a k-car ( a nicely rhyming automobile)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,) ask Am I right?

if I was Phil alexander,
I'd write a song about your yard
If I was Phil Alexander
maybe make a joke ot two, it's not that hard
maybe I could put a refrigerator in there
(that would be fabulous)

If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd write about fur coats ( but not a real fur coat, not cool)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd rhyme stuff about exotic pets
like a rhino or an elephant
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd rhyme with John Merrick's remains
(there's those crazy elephant songs)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)ask Am I right?

If I was Phil Alexander
we wouldnt have to write a song no more
If I was Phil Alexander
I'd write a million, and none would be a bore
If I was Phil Alexander
I wouldnt write about Kraft dinner
( Of course I would, I'd just write more
and make up real exotic stories about it
that's right, all the fanciest rhymers.. dijon schmijon....mmmmm

If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd write about your dress (but not your big fat ass, that's cruel)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd rhyme about some zite ( like an acne or a carbunkle)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil alexander,)
I'd rhyme something with monkey maybe I could use funky)
If I was Phil Alexander (if I was Phil Alexander,) ask Am I right"
If I was Phil Alexander
If I was Phil Alexander
If I was Phil Alexander
If I was Phil Alexander