Fresh tray to feed Polly
No say, must feed Polly

Hey, out the way, it may sound bizarre
It's true, not a ruse though it is a farce
Because all my work goes to stuff this pet of mine
Afraid that I'm stuck, these Ritz are like drugs
I can't wait until it dies

Feed Polly not with birdseed, Polly wants crackers
It gets pissed if I dare miss one, it must feed
Ask me how I got these scars, those nasty talons strike hard
And if it's not those, it's rippin' flesh with the beak
Feed Polly with what it needs, Polly wants crackers
Ev'ry check that I get ends up as its feed
Never enough, it wants more, as much as I can afford
Or it will poop on my floor, must feed Polly

You can ask how I'm slave to a parrot (that sounds pathetic, true)
"It's a stupid bird, just set it free (or simply smack 'til it's naught but feathers)"
If you met it, it would be apparent
Incredibly rude, smarter than you, about ten feet tall currently

Feed Polly or else I'll bleed (I can't question what Polly is wanting)
Polly wants crackers (giant birds are scary, just responding)
As it speaks, knows where I'm weak, not physic'lly (to the absolutely mass amount of lev'rage)
I just don't get how it's fair (not a cheeky little birb, that's former)
That there's real cunning in there (it's evolved into a massive monster)
All I can do is despair and feed Polly (it's no wonder beer's become my fav'rite bev'rage)

When I first bought it, thought that it loved me (it doesn't love me, it never loved me)
Just projecting my thoughts, silly me (that's ludicrous, so ludicrous)
Driven by just one motive: it's hungry (not much depth to it)
My one hope is shit, still long for it 'cause this diet ain't that healthy for Polly, feed Polly

Feed Polly, that's the decree, Polly wants crackers
Wafer-thin mint is in sight, well, hopefully
Because it's been twenty-five years since it ruined my life
And yet it hasn't turned into a blob, ev'rything about it ain't normal at all
Shouldn't be a wonder the shop I bought it vanished almost instantly
So strange, this freak Polly