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Song Parodies -> "Addicted To Duds"

Original Song Title:

"Addicted To Love"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Robert Palmer

Parody Song Title:

"Addicted To Duds"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

Another un-released one. Original song on YouTube

This guy’s all brawn, reeks of cologne​
Your mind is on his bone​
Stow re-grets, your body aches​
For him to kiss your babycakes​
From this creep, you got meat​
You bombed out, was not deep...
Was quite the plight, you now seethe​
Yet moving in is what you cede​
Ohh​

Lewd - Yike! We think that he’s baboon-ish and rough...beware!​
A poser who’s uncouth - you say you “can't give him up”​
As so, you’re wavin’ in home plate ‘cos​
You're addicted to duds​

True, he’s inclined to do the deed​
Quick in and out, ignores your needs
He’s obese, he’s such a slime​
And when you kiss: always grabs ‘hind, so un-re-fined​
Why can’t he shave?​
Go get his be-er, ‘cos you’re his slave​
He’s a bum: a hefty dude​
Welcome life: servitude​
Ohh​

You start to think of honeymoons and such stuff (like, yeah!...)​
Yet, knowing he’s untruthful and un-couthful and rough​
Then girl, you're gonna have to face it​
You're addicted to duds​

Might as well face it, you're addicted to duds​
Might as well face it, he’s as dumb as a spud​
Might as well face it, you're addicted to duds
Might as well face it, comes home covered in crud
Might as well face it, you're addicted to duds​

The guy’s a prawn*, moved in your home
Your bills: yes, out they’ve blown​
For he bets and he’s unkind​
You reminisce for better times​
Ohh oohh​

And yike! B.O. stinks but he’s so cute ‘cos he’s tough (oh dear...)​
He’s overly hirsute (which grates you) when in the buff​
But now it’s too late to backspace him​
You're addicted to duds​

Might as well face it, self-inflicted with duds​
Might as well face it, you’ve a sickness for duds​
Might as well face it, you're constricted by duds​
Might as well face it, mind’s afflicted by duds​

Might as well face it, you’re a victim of duds​
Might as well face it, girl, they ain’t no big studs
Time to get, baby, get yourself some new blood...
Might as well face it...

* Prawn – aussie insult = dickhead, useless person etc

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Andy Primus - November 01, 2022 - Report this comment
Laughed at this one. Faves were "baboon-ish and rough" & "Quick in and out, ignores your needs". Which of you came up with those?
Peregrin - November 02, 2022 - Report this comment
Both mine, Andy. "Quick in and out" was channeling from A Clockwork Orange, but Merry could have just as easily had that idea, she knows the movie.
Phil Alexander - November 02, 2022 - Report this comment
Excellent stuff :-)
Peregrin - November 02, 2022 - Report this comment
Thanks Phil and Andy!

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