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Song Parodies -> "Flaked Up"

Original Song Title:

"Straight Up"

Original Performer:

Paula Abdul

Parody Song Title:

"Flaked Up"

Parody Written by:

Below AVerage Dave

The Lyrics

I'm at
My--hair's extreme
I've got split ends as it grows
(I kinda feel like)
there is no type of cream
No they just don't help out this fro

I've tried shampoos before
Wish that I didn't spend this time on my hair no more
Wish that I could style it with ease

Washed out the frizzies
I need something stronger than the Lever
(oh oh oh)
Tried all the products from Avon

Hats make me happy
Cause I don't have time for the endeavors
(oh oh oh)
Hair battles are no fun

Soaps, had my fill
Can't be cured by goos
(Massaging my scalp)
It'd be such a thrill
If I could keep one hair do

Black just cannot be worn
If I did ev'ryone would see more white stuff than soft porn
How about some Head N Shoulders please

Flaked up all on me
Nothing seems to help whatsoever
(oh oh oh)
Seems these tangles can't be undone

Selsun don't help me
All I see is snow on the weather
(It's Not Cold)
But outside there's lots of sun

Hair' s more wild than sea weed
Jerks call me a freak
I scare Mar'lyn Manson

I really wish I could tame
My hair's like live snakes
A st-st-st stone-st st st stone

Can-can you shave me
Can-can you shave me Barber
(Cut it off)
Can-can you shave me
Can-can you shave me
(Buzz Cut Barber)

So my new looks a bore
At least I don't make all friends
Eyes get so damn sore
Now that I can guarantee
that my head wont make people scared of me-
I don't think you understand
I got sick and tired, then took command
and now I'm enjoying a great breeze

Grows back too quickly (Quickly)
Grows back too quickly (Quickly)
Grows back too quickly (Quickly)
Grows back too quickly
Grows back too quickly

Grew back too quickly
Guess I'm stuck with this look now forever
(oh oh oh)
I look like I'm Medusa's son

Flakes falling from me
But there is no frosting whatsoever
(oh oh oh)
I've only just begun

It's growing thickly
Some say that my hair looks like a weapon
(oh oh oh)
Called the devil by a bunch of nuns

I may sound cranky
But you gotta know this is not any fun
(oh oh oh)
I think it may weigh a ton
This has been a Below Average Dave Production, All Rights Reserved.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   13

User Comments

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LilHareNorCAL - September 08, 2008 - Report this comment
Hey there DevilDude, like the wildHare there . .
Matthias - September 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Tons of great lines in this one like you scaring Marylin Manson as well as the line, "If I did ev'ryone would see more white stuff than soft porn". Really funny one, I can't wait for the recording!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 09, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wonderful array of product placements here. Also rofl'd at that middle verse... 'Black just cannot be worn, if I did ev'ryone would see more white stuff than soft porn. How about some Head N Shoulders please?' ;D
Guy - October 12, 2008 - Report this comment

This parody give "bad hair day" a whole new meaning. Good one, BAD.
Agrimorfee - October 13, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) A good old-fashioned BAD-style pop parody. Great choruses, varying the "-ever" rhymes.
Glen S - October 13, 2008 - Report this comment
Fun song. I tend to cut off my hair whenever it becomes long enough to involve 'management'. Very good for product placement, and would be fun to sing I thinks. Hard to follow the written word sometimes due to the pace of the original. My personal favorite was the sub: "Can-can you shave me Can-can you shave me Barber"
Jason - October 16, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This was good as always. You must be the king of the chorus-variator! Personally I don't like varied choruses, but this was great anyway.
EmiLoca - October 20, 2008 - Report this comment
SOTM - That's funny that Jason isn't a fan of varied choruses, because I have special appreciation for song parodies that change the chorus every time. That said, you did a number on this one.
Peter Andersson - October 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Something by Slash from Guns and Roses might have been the ultimate OS for this subject but thanks for dusting this old classic (of your shoulders) for a nice parody. I'm with Glen on cutting it off when it becomes long enough for management and it drives my female coworkers crazy that my annual hairdo cost is like five dollars (calculated from Swedish kronor) for one or tops two bottles of dandruff schampoo whereas theirs are at least twenty times that a month, he-he-he.
bobpiecheese - October 29, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) 100% classic Below Average Dave. Great pacing, high on the funny, and those little quirks that give a BAD parody that style that I just love. This may seem a bit crawly bum-lick, but that's just the mood I'm in. 555 for you!
Gianni Parmesiani - October 29, 2008 - Report this comment
SOTM- Another ouch for this month. Palin, Spears, and Abdul taken down in one month (see other SOTM entries for the month). You've done a nice job hair...I mean here.
Max Power - October 29, 2008 - Report this comment
Invisible Boy - October 31, 2008 - Report this comment
I agree with Bob...this was classic BAD. Well written, self depreciating and funny. I remember this OS and I know this will be a good recording.
Blaydeman - July 21, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Man this is classic! Dave you always know how to take a topic that is used a lot and run with it to make it unique. Awesome job!
Syncronos - July 21, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Not at all what I was expecting, but this is great work, Dave. You know...they make a shampoo that...oh, ever mind.
Rex - July 30, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Hi, my name's Dan. Dan Druff. And I support this parody. Fun stuff.
bobpiecheese - August 03, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) See above, apparently. Don't remember reading this before, but it seems it's just as awesome as I don't remember! If that makes sense. Which I'm sure it doesn't.

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