It's your turn to sing, you're sweating like a fat man in the sauna.
You do your big thing, you sing off key though it impressed Paula.
You wanna be a big celebrity in big Hollywood.
We're gonna see if you can make it through Simon's antic.
You're now frantic.

Cuz' you're with Simon, Simon Cowell.
He's never positive cuz' what he says is always foul.
You're stuck with Simon, Simon Cowell.
You're hoping you will pass after hearing whinin' Simon Cowell.

You sing a grand song, and realize that your voice really sucks,
You sang the words wrong, when Simon speaks then, boy, you know your ****ed.
You sang real high, and hoped that it would impress that ole' piehole.
But all the while you're gonna be tramatized for your life,
Got criticised.

By that dumb Simon, Simon Cowell.
There ain't no second chance, cuz' when he says you're bad, you're out.
Got dissed by Simon, (oh no!!!!) Simon Cowell.
You're hoping you will pass after hearing whinin' Simon Cowell.

Bad singers fall,
And they act like they we're so good anyways.
There's no escaping comments from this British music man.
(Well, I sure tried)
You are the weakest link, bye.

After the shows done, there's reporters attacking from each side.
They will pester you, until an interview is on your time.
Now is the time, to screw the show and exploit all their secrets.
On the Enquirer, they'll believe any little word you say,
You'll make them pay,

Let's take down Simon, Simon Cowell.
His words never encourage, and he irritates the crowd.
Let's take down Simon, Simon Cowell.
So give me the darn mic, I'll sing to whinin' whinin' Simon!!
Ole' Simon Cowell.
Cuz' you're with Simon, Simon Cowell.
He's never positive cuz' what he says is always foul.
You're stuck with Simon, Simon Cowell.
You're hoping you will pass after hearing whinin' Simon Cowell.