The world is waiting for your words to appear
You know your every thought is something they revere
Whatever's going on, every second of the year
You tweet it, you tweet it

'Cause everybody needs to hear about you
To find out where you are and all the things you do
So when you eat lunch, or you go to the zoo
You tweet it, every minute or two

Just tweet it, tweet it, tweet it, tweet it
Thinkin' that the people need it
Sharing your life, the lows and the highs
Telling it all, with all that implies

You tweet it, you tweet it
You tweet it, you tweet it

Your car is dirty and your sock has a hole
They stopped you at the mall for an opinion poll
You're shopping at the store for a larger fish bowl
You tweet it, you tweet it

I think it's crazy that you have such a need
To publicly announce your every word and deed
When actually the people want to hear about ME
I'm certain that's the way it should be

I'm tweeting, tweeting, tweeting, tweeting
'Til my phone is overheating
Tellin' the people that I just might
Vacuum the carpet one of these nights

I tweet it, tweet it, tweet it, tweet it
Never tell me I should beat it
You need to see the things that I write
You need to know if I'm drinking Sprite

I tweet it (tweet it tweet it...)
Tweet it (tweet it tweet it...)
Tweet it (tweet it tweet it...)
Tweet it (tweet it tweet it...)
Tweet it (tweet it tweet it...)

[SPOKEN OVER GUITAR SOLO]
Hey, the cat just rubbed against my leg!
Better tweet it.
And look at that, there's a stain on the sofa!
Better tweet it.
You know, I think I'll have a beer.
But before I do, I should tweet it.
Man, that TV commercial was funny!
Definitely need to tweet about that.
I wonder if Twitter needs to know I trimmed my nose hair?
Ha, of course they do!
[END SPOKEN PART]

Tweet it, tweet it, tweet it, tweet it
Never thinkin' I'm conceited
Showin' the world that I've got a life
Got to go polish my butter knife

[FADE OUT]
I tweet it, tweet it, tweet it, tweet it
Everybody go repeat it
I can imagine all your delight
When I'm describing my cellulite

I tweet it, tweet it, tweet it, tweet it
Feeling like I just succeeded
Certain that I am so erudite
Posting my thoughts on Dudley Do-Right

I tweet it, tweet it, tweet it, tweet it
I should never be deleted
Twitter has servers with petabytes
They need more storage for my insights