Buddy, I'm scared to look inside my cellar, know I may sound mad
But if you-ou hear the-e sounds I've hea-eard, then you-ou would agree-ee
Sounds like a dragon who's really mad that it's stuck next to Bigfoo-oot
That refuses to turn down his One Direction CDs

Crazy things inside my cellar
Makes me wo-onder if I'm sa-ane
Swear the things inside my cellar
Aren't the pro-oduct of my brai-ai-ai-ain

Sometimes I hear a loud knock which sends a chill down to my knee-ees
I don't know if it's mutant frea-eaks or a trapped man's final plea-ea
It could be spiders, huge monsters in the dark, could be the floor's gonna cave
Could just be me and the slightly-passed-its-use-by pie I just ate

Creepy things inside my cellar
Hope it's a-all just in my brai-ain
Hearing things inside my cellar
Lack of you-our belief's a pai-ai-ai-ain

But you ca-an't expect me
To explore that dark terrai-ee-ain
Because it's rea-eally spooky
Not used to this crowbar's wei-ee-ei-ee-ei-ee-ei-ee-eight
No

It would be really-y nice o-of you-ou
To see what the hell lies
Down those creaking stai-airs, just a squi-uiz
To prove that my fears aren't just lies

Scary things inside my cellar
Find them, pro-ove I'm not insa-ane
Look for things inside my cellar
First reco-over from the pai-ee-ai-ain, oh yeah-eah-eah
Because I, because I
Pushed you downstairs, swear I'm not mea-ean