Everyone looks down at me - the hunter of the bounty,
But in my life of disrepute, I have my pride and joy:
His mama named him Timmy; he was a carefree fellow,
I knew I'd have to do a lot to educate this boy.

He was only ten years old when I got out of prison
I looked after Timmy, since he was my oldest son.
When it was time for career advice, this is what I said:
"Son, we're gonna catch bad guys and have a lot of fun."

(Chorus)
"Promise me, son, you will hunt men on the run,
Bail jumping men who rape and steal.
Your income will be high, if you beat the FBI,
I hope you grasp this secret I reveal:
Son, you might have to fight for a book deal."

Sometimes we hit it big and sometimes we just struck out,
But when Andrew Luster came along, things started to get weird.
He was on trial for three rapes; it looked like he was losing
Until one day when he jumped bail and simply disappeared.

Bail jumping rich folks were one of our specialties,
'Cuz the reward was big enough to capture our attention;
We hoped the publicity would lead to book and movie deals.
So when we began to chase Luster, I spoke these words again:

(Repeat chorus)

We got a tip that he was seen on a beach in Mexico
So we assembled a team with, of course, a TV crew.
We knew that this capture would put us on the road to fame,
When we saw him at a taco stand, we knew just what to do.

We had beaten the FBI and I sprayed Luster with mace,
But the Mexican police showed up and ruined our day,
They told us that we broke the law and put us all in jail.
Timmy was my cellmate and this is what I heard him say:

"I promised you, Dad, I would hunt men who were bad,
Such as wealthy rapists who jump bail.
We made a great try to beat the FBI.
I hope you understand my mournful wail:
Dad, get my little tushie out of jail!"

Everyone looks down at me - the hunter of the bounty.