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Song Parodies -> "Keep Those Vouchers Away From The Niggers"

Original Song Title:

"When The Lights Go Down In The City"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Keep Those Vouchers Away From The Niggers"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

In the bad old days, slave owners kept their slaves on the plantation by keeping them from learning how to read. These days, our public schools serve much the same function, and also help to keep those poor white "crackers" on the new government plantation.
Keep those books away from the niggers,
Or they might think of esca-ape;
If they learn how to re-e-e-ead, they get uppity
(O-oh no!) and get awa-a-ay.

Must enforce racial bussing;
Keep niggers in cracker schools!
We'll barricade them in; from the city, get awa-y-ay.
Make them sta-a-ay!

It's bad! Oh!
There've been times when
They almost escaped the projects!
Raise the ala-a-a-a-a-arms!
Whoa-ooh-oa-oa! Don't let them get ou-ut!
No, no wa-a-ay!

Keep those vouchers away from the niggers,
Or they'll learn how to esca-a-ape.
Keep those niggers in pu-ublic schools, and on welfare,
O-or else they'll get awa-a-ay.

[Electric Guitar Freestyle]

We can't let the niggers have their vouchers,
Or the next election day,
All the bills will come du-u-u-ue for our misdeeds,
(Oh-ooh-oh-oh) Hell to pa-a-ay!
(M-m-m-mmm) Hell to pa-a-ay!
See, if poor blacks and whites were ever to escape the government plantation, they might get out and start roaming around the suburbs where rich white people live...

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.7
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   1
 3   3
 4   2
 5   7

User Comments

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Agrimorfee - August 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Whoa, Offender. i jumped here right away, ready for a fight. The N-word is pretty touchy in any situation, you oughta realize that. On the whole, I see what your're saying with this, but it's not the best parody you have written.
Song Title Police - August 17, 2005 - Report this comment
TOS is called "Lights." That's the full title.
Red Ant - August 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Offender, as always (well, most always) you piqued my curiousity here. Do you have any links or websites that tell more about this?
Chuck A. Spear - August 17, 2005 - Report this comment
It's funny because it's true! Well done! And it's reassuring to know that there are a few people who can still think, in spite of the government indoctrination camps known as schools.
Tim Mayfield - August 17, 2005 - Report this comment
This is sad. I mean if no one can read or write, who's gonna write parodies? Think about it. We need to teach everybody to speak english and use the same accent and pronunciation and get the same jokes. We need assimilation. We need an audience. ...we need a life...
Michael Pacholek - August 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Oh, and the private schools Chuck A. likes so much AREN'T indoctrination camps? Bob Jones, heal thyself.
Offender - August 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, I know the old N-word raises some hackles, Agrimorfee. That's why I used it! Ironically, you can offend a lot more people these days by playing Mark Twain books-on-tape than you can by playing Eminem.

The official title may be "Lights," officer, but I'll bet the public agrees that the official title's too short.

There are plenty of websites on school choice, but you might want to start with an e-book, which is an autobiography from Frederick Douglass. Chapter VI is especially interesting.

"In spite" and "because" are in equal measure here, Mr. Spear. I first learned to hate socialism in all of its forms because of how I suffered under that most insidious of all socialist institutions, the public school system. I hope to free all of its slaves some day soon.

Given the choice, I am confident that people will assimilate themselves, Mr. Mayfield.

All schools are indoctrination camps, Mr. Pacholek. The public schools are the government's indoctrination camp, funded with taxpayer dollars from the very people who hate it the most (myself, for one). Here's a little thought to keep you awake at night: what would the government schools be like if everyone you hate happened to be in the government?

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