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Song Parodies -> "Don't Vote Me for President"

Original Song Title:

"Eric B. Is President"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Eric B. & Rakim

Parody Song Title:

"Don't Vote Me for President"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Truly a unique style of campaigning. Like if Humma Kavula's "Don't Vote for Stupid" campaign was directed at himself.
I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd show my appreciation for your support
I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this
Can't lie, okay?
Yeah
C-Cross my name right out

I'd be bad at this
I-I'd be bad, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this

Yeah!
I've said this before but I got ignored
That won't stop me from tryin' at least just once more
Stand in lines for me, cry for me, hold drives for me but I'm
Forced to do this crap, all of these scripted lines
I don't want your votes, it's not a joke
'Cause I'm not the person you want in charge of you folks
Not like I'm the bad type, no vile-ass ideas
I just mean that to lead is my all-time fear, heart's stilled (yeah!)
Believe me, I'd like to quit, can't be done (yeah!)
Let's say I'm afraid of one file dump (yeah!)
'Fraid it's so, I can do only this:
Please don't vote me, I'd be bad at this

I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad, I'd be bad, I'd be bad at this
I'd be bad at this (dump my ass)
Dump my ass
I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this (dump, dump my)
Dump, dump, dump, dump, dump

I can tell you're not thrilled, but sit back and chill
No gift for politics, why back me still?
I know jack-all about this stuff, shouldn't be allowed
To be seen on screens or by the crowds
It should be easy to pass on this
I can't answer shit, all of the questions I get from the press
Can't you see that that can't be from a man this damn big?
No, you squee and give me no damn thing I've wished
No debate skills on the mic and the last time I checked
Nobody wants a speech that's done off-the-cuff, even if
You lot live for it, hence the fact I'm not slippin'
My pollin' still climbs, the updates, I'm checkin'
Live, won't pay attention to what all y'all say, no
'Cause focus just ain't my style, got no sense of time
Yes, I'm shitter than the rest of them
Know crap-all about this stuff, don't give me your ballots

Damn it
I'd be, I'd be bad at this
Damn
I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad at this
Be so shit
Be so shit, shit

I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be bad at this, I'd be bad, I'd be bad
I-I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I-I-I'd be, I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad, I'd be

Just wouldn't work, so please let me off
The pics I'm hidin' will stay residin' in that file, tight locked
Don't have to win this crap, they just told me to run, see
Hang on, who asked what have I done lately?
That's the thing, see? That's why I want your rejection
This whole thing I'm doin' is for my RE-election
Take me out 'cause I've proved this one thing:
I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I've done jack, it's true, why would you keep me up
I even said while speechin' my whole schedule was freed up
Please call me lazy or call me crazy
Let me lose, I don't want this crap, please hate me

I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be bad, I'd be bad, I'd be bad at this

I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be, I'd be bad at this
I'd be, I'd be bad, I'd be bad, I'd be bad
I-I, I-I'd be, I'd be bad at this

"It should be easy to pass on this
I can't answer shit, all of the questions I get from the press
Can't you see that that can't be from a man this damn big?
No, you squee and give me no damn thing I've wished"

I'd be
I'd be, I'd be bad
I'd be bad at this

I said, I said that four years ago
I said that four years ago
I said that four years ago, but you just ignored it

Damn it
I'd be bad at this
Goddamn, dump my ass
Dump my ass
Dump, dump, dump, dump, dump
Dump my ass, please don't be stupid
Dump my ass, please don't be stupid
Dump my ass, dump my ass
Dump my ass, dump my ass, dump my ass, please don't be stupid

I'd be bad at this
I'd be bad at this
I'd be bad at this
I'd be bad at this

It's a bold strategy, Cotton, let's see if it pays off for 'im.

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