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Song Parodies -> "People Are Feeble"

Original Song Title:

"People Are People"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Depeche Mode

Parody Song Title:

"People Are Feeble"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Classic adventuring party setup: elf, dwarf, gnome/halfing, orc, some kinda beast man...and right in the middle, pathetic pink meatbag. Why?
People are feeble, why is one the lead
Of this little ragtag adventure party?
People are feeble, so fragile and weak
So why is one at the front? Someone tell me (ugh, ugh, ugh)
Ugh, ugh, ugh

Our small band of faux-brothers share a similar creed
To overthrow leaders who rule for their needs
Why is it me who's crazy 'cause I see something wrong
With our point man? It's this dude who isn't smart or strong
I don't understand what makes a man
The one with the plan 'cause he doesn't, man

People are feeble, a whole damn species
Of a size that barely comes up to my knees
People are feeble, it's not hard to see
Why the front lines are where they just shouldn't be (ugh, ugh, ugh)

I don't understand
I don't understand, I don't understand

Lacks the senses of an elf, scales of the lizardfolk, see
Constitution of a dwarf? Don't lie to me
Unlike our gnome scout, he lacks technological gifts
Doesn't even have some magic to outclass my orc fists (he's still around?)
I don't understand why this small man
Leads our little clan, it's just really sad

People are feeble, no good skills to see
Not a strategist or our comic relief
People are feeble, well, this one, at least
When we find a better one, then I'll have peace (ugh, ugh, ugh)
Ugh, ugh, ugh

I don't understand why there's this man
With his stupid hat, kinda makes me mad
I don't understand why this weak man
Thinks his role is grand, just tripped on his pants
I don't understand this puny man
Nothing there to brag about, he just lacks
I don't understand, why keep this man (why can't he leave)?
He breaks just like that, making our trek drag
I don't understand this stupid man (pointless and weak)
In the dark, he can't see beyond his ass
I don't understand this weak-ass man (no use to see)
Might've formed the band but that's all, that's sad
I don't understand

I play DnD and I love to create a bajillion characters for potential play. Not one human. All they get is +1 to every ability score. Nothing else. No natural weapons, no armour class boosts, no innate spells, nothing. So boring!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   13
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 13
 

User Comments

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ยง - July 07, 2021 - Report this comment
You are feeble, Seth.

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