when Kobe went down to Boulder,
he was lookin for a pair to feel
he was in a bind, cause they're hard to fine
and this teenager seemed real
so he came across a young girl freely dancin and lookin hot
and he laid on the charm, and extended his arm, and said
Girl lemme tell you what
I guess you shouldn't do it, but I'm a star in N.B.A
and in your next role, you'll ride my pole
and I'll leave you then next day
now you may have some experience girl,
but that aint worth a hoot
so lay right there, and don't be scared,
if I dribble before I shoot

the girl said, you, there Kobe,
and it might be a sin,
I'm a wigglin shaker, and you're a laker,
so place that thing right in

Kobe lubricate your thing and get this woman hot
please don't tell her that she's swell
just give her what you've got
and when the police come a lookin for a tip
tie off that reservoir and keep it in the tip..

they went right back to their love place,
or so the story goes
and he made her scream to her fingertips
he put on quite a show
and when he finished he rolled right off and headed for a piss
and she dialled 911 and then we know
cause newsmen heard of this

and when old Kobe'd finished, she said
you're pretty good, old son
but I'm in cahoots, and my civil suit
will show you number one..

call from police boy, run boy run
evidence arising, in the lab by one
will he get a lawyer, will he show,
post big bail and off he goes..

well Kobe bowed his head, because he knew that he's been caught
off to california, will his wife take all he's got
In Boulder colorado, they said come on back old son
if you play for the nuggets, we'll let you off this one

call from police boy, run boy run
evidence arising, in the lab by one
will he get a lawyer, will he show,
post big bail and off he goes..