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Song Parodies -> "Modern Songbook"

Original Song Title:

"Modern Woman"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Modern Songbook"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Mike is taking a potshot at William Tong? According to St. Paul's letter to the DiRitos, this is one of the seven signs of the Apocalypse! Nevertheless, it's gotta be done.
You see me sitting with computer and newspaper
in my old apartment building of Frank Lloyd Wright design.
With a click of the mouse I log on the website
get some funny lyrics on the page from my mind.

Now I'm in trouble, this is not intellectual.
I saw your song and figured out it's not right on time.
I just can't be the quiet type, I'm into great regrettal.
Bill, you should've got this settled then, 'cause now it's a crime!

Don't give me songs that are old, just go unfold the modern songbook.
You are an old-fashioned man, but understand here, Mr. Tong, look!
Use the modern songbook!

He won't be meek, his zings are professional.
He's got a lot of impudence, it's easy to see.
He wants to make a move, kick Bush in the posterior
but he sings something earlier, to Gingrich goes he!

He's got style, don't care about the money.
Don't catch no flies with honey, lets his vinegar harm.
But where's his sense, his songs are now past tense.
The horse has gotten out and now he's locking the barn!

He's got a plan of attack, but should go back to modern songbook.
You're an old-fashioned man, but understand here, Mr. Tong, look!
Use the modern songbook!

(instrumental interlude)

Time goes by and we're sharing this here website.
I say I love his songs and I know well why.
In the morning I look at songs he's once again done over.
It's a strange situation for a liberal guy.

But times have changed, and Newt is gone now, baby.
Hit guys who are here, not the guys who are through!
Amiright is sometimes used for kicks, but more than not it's politics
but it's not 1996, we want stuff that's new!

You got to learn to defuse and just peruse the modern songbook.
You're an old-fashioned man, but understand here, Mr. Tong, look!
Use the modern songbook!

You got Clintonian hip, that don't mean zip with the modern songbook!

You're really far out of date, you must relate to the modern songbook!

Read the mahhhhhhhh-dern sahhhhhhhhng-book!
Which means I'll look like a fool if I post "The Wreck of the Edgar Martinez," circa October 2001. So what.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

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Got a point there. - August 15, 2003 - Report this comment
As if William Tong's party-line monotony wasn't mind-numbing enough already, he's now dump-trucking all of his outdated stuff onto the site. I'm not sure which is worse--this, or Guy DiRito's fascist blather. Thank god there are other creative writers who don't use this site for political grandstanding.
Will - August 16, 2003 - Report this comment
Mike, please read this...

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