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Song Parodies -> "Dancin' With My Elf"

Original Song Title:

"Dancin' With Myself"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Idol

Parody Song Title:

"Dancin' With My Elf"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

If to Pole up North you go,
There's a fellow who goes, "Ho, ho, ho!"
With a jolly inflection
He tells his predilection:
"I'm dancin' with my elf."

His wife doesn't think it's right
To cavort with one so slight.
And his favorite song:
"Short People." That's so wrong!
Fat guy's dancin' with his elf.

He travels all over the world
With gifts for each boy and girl,
But before he flies,
Twinkle in his eyes
As he's dancin' with his elf.

Call it a Kris Kringle kink--
At least he doesn't dress in mink
Like his maiden aunts.
Shocked, Rudy looks askance
At him there, dancin' with his elf.

He's dancin' with his elf (2x)
While his missus reproves,
She admits: got great moves
As he's dancing with his elf.

He travels all over the world--
Coal for the boy who's a churl,
But before he flies,
He's twistin' his thighs
As he's dancin' with his elf.

Call it a Kris Kringle kink--
At least he's not given to drink
Like his maiden aunts,
Who get smashed, go on rants.
No, he's just dancin' with his elf.

And those cranky aunts
Put some Ben-Gay in Sant's
Bright-red underpants,
But he's nice, so he grants
Leeway to his aunts,
'cause he just wants romance.

There's no doubt that they are bad girls.
Santa don't care as he whirls
Like a dervish who flies,
With one half his size,
Yes, he's romancin' his elf.

His ratfink aunts sit and drink
Then pass out, and he's in the pink.
Off have come his pants;
From his sack he implants
A tip-dipped lagniappe in his elf.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

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McKludge - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Love it. Elves are people, too, after all. 555
alvin - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
lol...this would make a great video
littleCupCakes - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
555 for showing us the Satyr side of dear Santa.
Michael Pacholek - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
I tried dancing with an elf once. Unfortunately, she and I are both klutzes (and she has admitted such in some of her own parodies). It didn't end well.
MrMacphisto - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Best of the day... lol...
John Barry - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, McKludge, Alvin, CupCakes, Michael, MrM.
Jonathan S. - December 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Why you snot! I had this idea for a title, too! Oh, well....DKTOS. Not bad spoof until the disturbing final line...yeee-e-e-c-c-chhhh...

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