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Song Parodies -> "Don't Sing It !"

Original Song Title:

"Black Velvet"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Alannah Myles

Parody Song Title:

"Don't Sing It !"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

DKTOS? Lyrics and .wav file here. Great OS but I've never heard anyone who could karaoke it worth a damn. Note: TOS has uneven syllable counts and emphasis so I followed that.
[short intro]

Uh ...

Misses Redneck... puts a quarter in the juke box
Same selection... as she chose last Friday night
Drunk 'n dancin'... (well more like she was stumblin')
Well I can tell ya... it wasn't a pretty sight...

She cannot sing, so out of tune.., ramble-ing
This was not a first, and it gets so much worse..

Don't sing it!,
Not a country girl's style!
Don't sing it!,
Leave it to Misses Myles!
It's quite disgracing..,
To hear someone so off-key
Don't sing it,
Shut up please!...


They don't listen.. and play it twice an hour*
Black Velvet's.. bound to drive you mad
Karaoke's... not the strength of this drunk cow girl
Simon Cowell is a man I understand!..

A slaughtered tune, time and again, in the saloon
The worst thing I've heard, words came out badly slurred!

[this chorus is what they sounded like]

Black helmet,
And that sh*tty boy's mine!
Black Elvis,
In that stormed weather sky!
And you were reachin',
That'll bring her to her needs
Blah-blah-it,
Ye-ee-esh!


Many girls... can sing along.. oh but damn! - this tune...

It got trashed... all night long.., it happened - it's true

Eardrums were screwed!

[solo, the best part of the song b/c
there are no lyrics to mutilate!]

Don't sing it!,
Not a country girl's style!
Don't sing it!,
Leave it to Misses Myles!
It's quite disgracing..,
To hear someone so off-key
Don't sing it,
Shut up please!...

Don't sing it!,
Not a country girl's style!
Don't sing it!,
Leave it to Misses Myles!
It's quite disgracing..,
To hear someone so off-key
Don't sing it:
Shut up please!...

Would you please!

Pretty please...?!

Our ears bleed...!

[outro]
copyright 2006+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher. *Yes, this song was played that often. I think in the 16 months I worked part-time at my first job I heard this song approximately 500 times.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   6
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Orange Ant - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey, I thought TOS was from the 90s. Was it recorded in 89 or something? Nice parody anyways.
Stephen Harrington - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
555, I tried to play the wav-file of the song, but the program wouldn't respond and I had to exit it. Luckily, after looking at the OS's title, I remembered what song you parodied, easy to understand(although I dislike Simon Cowell myself). I would sound terrible trying to sing this song too(I don't think there is really anyone that could sing it), luckily I don't want to sing it. ^___^
alvin rhodes - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
too funny...5s
Red Ant - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Orange Ant, Step-chan and Alvin. Orange Ant, the CD was released on March 28, 1989 [source: Amazon.com]. The US Chart Peak Position: #1, March 24, 1990 [varied sources].
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
I actually have the "Rockinghorse" album, I bought it (on sale, thank God) for one song (that I already knew) alone; "Our World Our Times", which isn't a bad song, but wasn't half as good as I remembered. And (BTW) why is it that Canadian female rockers all go by names like Alannah, Alanis, Avril etc?
Adagio - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Now there's an orange ant? lol Good parody, Jack. I can see why they would want to sing it, but they should get a hint. 5's
AFW - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Paints a funny scenario--5's
Seamonkey - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Good lord, you hit the friggin' nail on the head... many a karaoke night have I hung my head and sobbed, "No... no... please karaoke fairy, please... not again..." when the first chords of this song began. You really... understand us all Red... um, I mean Mr. Ant.
Red Ant - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Peter, Pat, AFW and Seamonkey.

I forgot to reply to Step-chan's comment about playing TOS: it plays automatically on that site, no downloads are needed. It loads fast too since it's a 32bps recording.

Peter, I have no idea on that question.

Seamonkey: There is a fine line between Alaanah's low, raw, sultry, somewhat Pat Benetar-sounding voice and an alley-cat in heat with vocal chord cancer being torn to shreds by a pack of hungry jackals. All karaoke I've heard of this song fall into the latter sound description. ;-)
Rick C - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Good one, Jack! I was in a band with a female singer who did this OS. She actually did a great job on it but, if I never hear it again, I wouldn't mind. 555
Red Ant - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Thank you Rick.
Larry Hensley - February 05, 2006 - Report this comment
Cool parody!
Red Ant - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Larry.

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