what can bring such pleasure
in any kind of weather
learnt in home economy
what things lie within
will make your fears all come true
from the pan to you and me
why not give it a try
takes allsorts to survive
culinary pornography
pine nuts sure to expand
i'm telling you first hand
while the steam is boiling meat

in my gravy
you will find chips and peas
in my gravy
you will find christmas trees
in my gravy
maybe lumpy but never bland
chunky gravy lumpy gravy
its the best stuff in the land
lumpy gravy
you can eat it with your hand
chunky gravy
it was hitlers masterplan
stodgey gravy
some old people you must de-mand
lumpy gravy chunky gravy
hair goes wavy chunky gravy

they want stew, they want stew
they want stew with a new beetroot

if you like your dentures
don't you eat the centre
no diluting made to last
don't you linger mate
no need to use a plate
they're using it to form a cast
maybe it looks like dung
it never goes astray
we don't do curry,but i sing
while i pour my gravy
entrees a tad wavy
inspecting every strand and pea

on my gravy
yes you can sail the seven seas
in the gravy
yes you will never find the cheese
in the gravy
come on now people under-stand
it's my gravy,it's my gravy
it's gonna creep across the land
lumpy gravy
it's gonna wreck your prostrate gland
chunky gravy
if your not a jello fan
eat my gravy
i've gotta make you under-stand
lumpy gravy,chunky gravy
hair goes wavy,lumpy gravy

looks like poo,looks like poo
looks like poo in old boots

why me?

they won't chew,they won't chew
they won't chew it's a three bean soup

but,but i need a glass of water
spray spray cook
man he dropkick you watch the debris

they won't chew, they won't chew all my gravy

full of goodness
will make a man of marines

they will sue,they will sue
in the navy