Song Parodies -> "Troy Was Unfurled"

Original Song Title:

"Joy to the World"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Troy Was Unfurled"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Answer to Airforcewon's "Troy to the World," to the tune of the Christmas carol. Original written by Hoyt Axton.

Trojan film, it was a full dog.
Wasted ten bucks of mine.
I never understood a word that Brad Pitt said
and Orlando Bloom did whine.
And he always had some mighty fine whine.

Sing it!
"Troy" was unfurled.
And all my hair has curled, now.
"Troy" sleeps with fishes in Aegean Sea.
"Troy," no stars from me.

If I were the King of the Greeks
I'll tell you what I'd do:
I'd tell Paris keep that skanky Helen chick
and keep sweet peace with you.

Hey, now!
"Troy" was unfurled.
And all my hair has curled.
"Troy" sleeps with fishes in Aegean Sea.
"Troy," no stars from me.

(instrumental break)

You know we love the lady.
Yes, Diane Kruger's fun.
But "National Treasure" was her better leisure.
This film was a sum of a bum!
I say, this was a sum of a bum!

Sing, now!
"Troy" was unfurled.
And all my hair has curled.
"Troy" sleeps with fishes in Aegean Sea.
"Troy," no stars from me.

"Troy" was unfurled.
And all my hair has curled.
"Troy" sleeps with fishes in Aegean Sea.
"Troy," no stars from me.

"Troy" was unfurled.
All my hair has curled.
"Troy" was unfurled.
"Troy," no stars from me.

"Troy" was unfurled.
And all my hair has curled.
"Troy" sleeps with fishes in Aegean Sea.
"Troy," no stars from me.

Oh well, oh well, oh well, oh
"Troy" was unfurled.
And all my hair has curled.
"Troy" sleeps with fishes in Aegean Sea.
"Troy," no stars from me.

(repeat 'til the song seems as long and plodding as the film)

Beware of Poles bearing gifts, because when it came to bashing this film, I didn't HORSE around.

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alvin rhodes - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

especialy love the agean sea line....nice job..5s

Red Ant - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

Haha on the last line Michael ( the "repeat..." ). Arwen's going to have a fit when she sees this!! ( Cue Arwen! ) =)

AFW - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

Excellently done...good follow up to my "Troy To The World"

Rick C - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

I agree, boooooring film. Good parody though. 555. Michael, I have to shamelessly plug one of my parodies I think you missed but, may like (then again, you may not): http://amiright.com/parody/60s/simonandgarfunkel70.shtml

Arwen - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

1. I liked the movie. Dammit. But, again, I have to agree that Orlando was a whiney baby in it...so, good call.

2. Yes, National Treasure was a better movie for Diane...and, to quote my dear friend, Ashkicksass, after seeing her performance in Troy..."A face to launch ten thousand ships, my ass!"

3. I was all set to have a fit, Red Ant...but I was too busy swooning over Mr. Pacholek's newly curly hair...; )

Michael Pacholek - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

Actually, I just got a haircut, and it's almost totally straight again. (There's an Orlando joke I could use there, but I won't.) And, yes, Arwen, you're right. Your ass is so fine it could launch 10,000 ships. It's certainly launched a few songs.

Arwen - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

If anyone ever wonders why I love you so much, Mr. Pacholek...it is for comments like that...=) You can launch a ship...or a song...or...whatever...in my honor anytime you'd like...=)

(Yes, even in spite of the implication toward Orlando's manliness. Complimenting me always trumps jabs at my would be boyfriends....=)...)

Ashkicksass - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

Seeing Brad's ass was best part of this film. The rest was just BO-RING! Good call Mr. P. And LOL on Arwen's ass!

Meriadoc - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

Ah Michael darling, I know that somehow, someday you will actually write a non-political parody on a subject that I know something about.... I am such a dreamer... :-)

Johnny D - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment

A Trojan-anthem worthy of Edmundous Fitzgeraldopoulos, indeed.

Stuart McArthur - July 08, 2005 - Report this comment

well, I didn't mind the film as far as movie epics go (apart from weird Brad Pitt) but your last line was funny MP, and well-written as usual - 555

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