Why do I never hear a riddle
When I'm feeling insecure?
I need someone skilled at jestin'
Who can cheer me up for sure

It's when I've failed another maths test
There is nothing more I need
Than a good old-fashioned moron
Who'll slip over just for me

How come I never hear an answer
When I say 'Why this no fair?'
'Cause I really would like to know
As well as fix up my grammar

I do not care how you do it
When you cheer up poor ol' me
I only care that you mean it
And not do it lazily

You forgot what the punchline is?
Don't stand there like a fool
You should tell a joke about it
Then laugh and continue

I'm looking for something to make me laugh
I'm looking for a side-splitting kind of laugh
If you could tell jokes and tickle me pink
Then I'll stop feeling blue
Maybe buy lunch for you

Between the boredom of Ms. Monten
And the brashness of Miss Dee
There should be one who keeps jestin'
But there's not, alas, poor me

But in the time they call recess
There comes along a fool
He shares his jokes and his ruckus
And you know that he is you

I'm looking for someone to make me laugh
I'm looking for a belly-ache kind of laugh
And if you could see what that means to me
To cheer me up in school
The place that bores you too
To learn what we don't care
To climb those stupid stairs

It's not the way you do it
When cheerin' all, not just me
It's more the way you can avoid it
When Sir asks 'What's so funny?'

Why do I never get a good wheeze
When I'm feelin' rather down?
I need someone good at jestin'
Who can turn frowns upside down

It's when I've blown another gasket
There is nothing more I need
Than a guy who'll waste his own time
To act stupid just for me

Why do I never get an answer
When I'm asking for a joke?