Jenny Craig, is home her phone starts beepin
legs like jelly pies is on the phone
to her feet, her calves keep slowly creepin,
not to mention her big belly roll

late at night her big old ass gets hungry
the rumblin sound is heard around the room
a pizza man is comin with salvatiion
she even sweeps the crumbs up with a broom

she stays in, watch the tube, a couch potato
just like them, her skin will grow some "eyes"
Regis, Kelly start out how the day goes
as she rubs some oil unto her thunder thighs

You can't hide
Those thunder thighs
And that dress
Is a thin disguise
I thought by now
You'd realize
Ain't no way to hide those thunder thighs


she has ordered fries from KFC kentucky,
poutine on the side, is really nice
tried the crispy chicken, it was yucky
settled for a triple cheesy slice

she gathers up her treats they hold together
puts the wrappers in bags when she's done
she's big enough to shield you from the weather
on her way to weighin half a ton

You can't hide
Those thunder thighs
And that dress
Is a thin disguise
I thought by now
You'd realize
Ain't no way to hide those thunder thighs


she gets up, and farts herself a long one
the ripples coincide with her big cheeks
sits back down finds her remote's the wrong one,
it's in her crack, it won't be seen for weeks

You can't hide
Those thunder thighs
And that dress
Is a thin disguise
I thought by now
You'd realize
Ain't no way to hide those thunder thighs