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Song Parodies -> "Ukraine Is Defeated"

Original Song Title:

"Just What I Needed"

Original Performer:

The Cars

Parody Song Title:

"Ukraine Is Defeated"

Parody Written by:

Immoral Liberal

The Lyrics

To hear most of our lying "news" media talk here in America and the West in general, you'd think everything is just peachy keen for Zelensky and his repressive regime in Ukraine in its struggle against the Russian invasion. What the Ukrainian people and the troops on the front line are saying, however, is quite a different story.

(Here's YouTube's official copy of the original song this is parodying.)
Been fighting a couple years,
(And) wasting people's lives.
For all the wasted blood and tears,
They're breaking out long knives.

It's not as if Zelensky cares
How any part of Ukraine fares;
(He's) wasting Ukraine's blood and tears,
And Ukrainians' lives...

This war Zelensky's stringing out
Makes Ukraine hate that creep;
Folks want to flush his carcass down
A latrine six feet deep... Yeah...

In vain, a million conscripts fell, and
Widows and orphans went through hell;
(They) want to flush Zelensky down
A latrine six feet deep.

Looks like Ukraine is defeated...
(Ukraine is defeated!)
It's devastated indeed.
Seems that Ukraine is defeated...
(Ukraine is defeated!)
There's no blood left there to bleed.

Ukraine has wasted two long years
On all Zelensky's lies... lies!
For wasted lives and blood and tears,
Folks hope in Hell he fries... yeah!

It's not as if Zelensky cares
How any poor widow's life fares;
(They) hope he'll fry eternally
For wasting their men's lives.

'Cause now Ukraine is defeated.
(Ukraine is defeated!)
Can't trust the lying "news" feed
That says Ukraine's not defeated
(Ukraine is defeated!)
While its people bleed and bleed.

It's clear Ukraine is defeated.
(Ukraine is defeated!)
If your eyes work, you can see:
See that Ukraine is defeated.
(Ukraine is defeated!)
From this quagmire the wise flee.

(Yeah... Yeah... They're fleeing...)
(Ukraine is defeated...)
(Ukraine is defeated...)
(Ukraine is defeated...)
Yeah, yeah, yeah...
Of course, even the Ukrainians there on the ground have their delusions; some are holding out hope that the U.S.A. will be sending troops to help them. Sorry, Ukraine, but we here in America aren't able to focus on more than one political crisis at a time; and ever since the October 7 Hamas terrorist attacks on Israel, your plight has been decidedly on the back burner for us. Besides, it's not as if the bumbling "diversity hires" (i.e. morons) running our military could help you even if the crisis in Israel hadn't stolen our attention: they left billions of dollars of military equipment in the hands of the Taliban in their botched withdrawal from Afghanistan; and for some reason, even a $50,000 enlistment bonus can't seem to entice very many American patriots these days to sign up to be harassed and persecuted by the aforementioned treasonous racist perverted "diversity hires" for being white, male, heterosexual, and/or patriotic.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   18

User Comments

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Susanna Viljanen - January 26, 2024 - Report this comment
Cope on, Putin fanboy. When you fight for your physical existence (like Finland in WWII), you do not count your losses. It is Russia who is losing - 400 000 Russkies are soon kaputt.
MAGA - January 26, 2024 - Report this comment
So... what color is the sky on your planet, Susie?
Susanna Viljanen - January 27, 2024 - Report this comment
Blue. I live on this planet, but I do not know on which you live.
MAGA - January 28, 2024 - Report this comment
Guess it must be Summer in Clown World where you live, then. Here in the real world, meanwhile, the sky is "a hazy shade of Winter" (as Simon & Garfunkel put it) and Russia is kicking Ukraine's аss.
Putin - January 28, 2024 - Report this comment
That's right Ukraine is losing and I got the Super Bowl ring!
MAGA - January 28, 2024 - Report this comment
So in Clown World, Putin speaks English and Russia plays American football? This planet where you delusion-dwellers live is fascinating!

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