I used to drill more holes than a construction site
I used to fling with ten gals (or more) a night
I used all the different ways on lays (with cold whip cream)
Now alone, I sit and whi-i-i-ine
Now alone, I sit and whine

I used to screw hot models and celebrities
Now I can't even get J-Lo to call
Perhaps I'll lose the pants and play with that Britney
Or go and find myself a blow up doll
Or go and find myself a blow up doll

Sell me, sell me doll for ploughing
No sex since God knows when
Spell me, smell me "nads are swelling
So please sell me, or rent
My balls are breaking, my body's quaking
And I can't afford a ho
Sell me, sell me, won't you sell me
I JUST GOT TO BLOW!!!

Blow Up Doll
Been so many weeks since used below
Blow Up Doll
Been so many weeks since rod had grown
Blow Up Doll
Won't you sell me please that plastic pro
Blow Up Doll-oll-oll

(Blow up doll, during solo)

Yelling, yelling
Won't start slowing
Make love to toy's rear end
Thrill me, thrill me, Don't it thrill me
The answer is "Hell Yes"
My balls done breaking, my bod's done quaking
She was well worth all the dough
Laid me, laid me doll just laid me
I'll PUT ON A SHOW!!!

Blow Up Doll
My favorite lady's a Mattel™ ho
Blow Up Doll
She don't need to shave, no grass to mow
Blow Up Doll
On bent plastic knee she likes to go
Blow Up Doll

(Romancing the Doll)
(Lights up a cigarette, doll pops)

"Oh Crap!"