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Song Parodies -> "The Laker"
Original Song Title:
"The Boxer"
Original Performer:
Simon & Garfunkle
Parody Song Title:
"The Laker"
Parody Written by:
Rick Duncan
The Lyrics
Part of my new philosophy about getting more topical. Yes, this has been done, here's my take.
I am quite a tall boy and my story's been well told
Went and squandered my clean image
For a night with one white chick that didn't like it rough
Lies, I attest, still a star cheats when he wants to cheat
When he is ranked the best
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm
Well I left my wife and my family; I was looking for some joy
From a cute hotel employee
Get "celebrity" room service from a hat check girl
Making whoop, don't take no for an answer
Now it all seems like a blur
Who's the press gonna listen to, me or her?
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie lielielielie lie
Asking only for some booty, man oh how I love this job
But I don't like hookers
Like to force myself on star-struck girls that come my way
I like 'em fair, there are times when they say they'll talk
But then they never dare
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie lielielielie lie
Now I'm wearing my Armani suit, and goin' into court
Into court
Where this bimbo and her lawyers put their greed on me
Bleedin' me in the court
In the end I am a Laker, adored by many fans
I can shoot the three and rebound
I can carry them at crunch time when
Shaq has five fouls or sits out
With my talent and my game
I'll be laughing, I'll be laughing
For the dollars ease the pain
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off, yes I'll still get off
Went and squandered my clean image
For a night with one white chick that didn't like it rough
Lies, I attest, still a star cheats when he wants to cheat
When he is ranked the best
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm
Well I left my wife and my family; I was looking for some joy
From a cute hotel employee
Get "celebrity" room service from a hat check girl
Making whoop, don't take no for an answer
Now it all seems like a blur
Who's the press gonna listen to, me or her?
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie lielielielie lie
Asking only for some booty, man oh how I love this job
But I don't like hookers
Like to force myself on star-struck girls that come my way
I like 'em fair, there are times when they say they'll talk
But then they never dare
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie
I lie lie lie lie lie lie lielielielie lie
Now I'm wearing my Armani suit, and goin' into court
Into court
Where this bimbo and her lawyers put their greed on me
Bleedin' me in the court
In the end I am a Laker, adored by many fans
I can shoot the three and rebound
I can carry them at crunch time when
Shaq has five fouls or sits out
With my talent and my game
I'll be laughing, I'll be laughing
For the dollars ease the pain
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off
I'll get off (crash) though you scoff, I'll still get off, yes I'll still get off
Swish!
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 |
User Comments
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I like topical and this was excellent. The double meaning ending was superb.
Brilliant!!!!
dribble dribble dribble 5's
its a masterpiece, rick...i laughed my ass off
You gotta love it. This is classic stuff. 5s
Excellent!! 5s!
Really good job, Rick. 5's
I am very impressed that you pulled this off.
Lie, lie, lie - Priceless. This is what I call a full court press. Well done Rickster,.
Thank you for telling it like it is (as we said during the Sixties). Just because somebody is a celebrity people think he can't be all bad. I give you a 5 for humor and sarcasim.
Outstanding!
Rick D - Man, you really stunned me with how good this is! There should be some way to give you a "triple-double" score here (Three "10's") for this! Not only is the story line totally consistent, but every single word, intonation and syllable in this thing falls right into sync with the original song. You took this one end-to-end and then finished with a slam dunk! Somehow I'm picturing Chick Hearn rolling over in his grave and applauding at the same time. Without knowing what else is out there I'd have to say this could very well be the "Sports Parody of The Year" on this site. Whoa, man, sounds like the mustard is coming off MY hot dog right now, but you've got me really jazzed up with this one.
Uhm, I speechless. This is a masterpiece. I'll read the above comments later - but whatever they said also.
Rick Dunkin' strikes again.
Mike P! I was wondering where you were. I don't do sports often, so I was wondering when you or someone was going to make that pun.
Again Duncan puts up an awesome parody for competition. Good luck in the March SOTM competition.
Nice job.
Good luck in the competition, Rick!
VERY funny, Rick, and SO right on the mark. Incredible job! A slammer jammer.
Btw, 5s across the backboard from here. Can't imagine why anyone would give you a 4--unless maybe he/she was a Lakers fan!
I thought I was a Lakers fan for many years until I moved to the Bay area and was forced to listen to people like Marv Albert. Now I know I was a Chick Hearn fan, who I would listen to without seeing the game. He loved the game, and it was infectious. When he died, a lot went out of my respect for the spoiled brats that play it now.
Excellent parody Rick!
Beautiful. "Celebrity room service." Heh heh.
Caught this one looking through "Song of the month" entries - awesomely well-written, Rick: don't know the (nudge, nudge) ins and outs of the story, but it's pretty clear from the lyric. Surprisingly similar in outlook but from a different perspective to one of my first written-for-amiright submissions to the same tune (but I spelt 'Garfunkel' right ;-) )
Voted on this earlier but never commented. Great job.
Excellent 'job' Rick.
Brill.
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