Called me with a little problem
And that little problem? "Shit don't work"
Gave no "Hello", wasn't nice
Still, I guess you're miffed, that's fine
Will I fix your little problem after work?

That old thing's unusable
It's past its date
You know what's making that loud whine?
It's the damn rust in which it's caked
I can't get it to "usable"
In a bad state
Stop being stubborn
And get the damn thing replaced

The whole thing is fried
Can't you see it's ceased to be?
It's gone, it's dead, don't like
The way that you ignore me
"It just needs power! You haven't tried!"
I'm sorry, but no amount of hot solder
Will reconnect the line to green that light
If I tried, the grease would smoulder

'Cause that old thing's unusable
Toss it post-haste
Each part's covered in such grime
Just the cleanup would take ten days, ah, that's disgusting
Each part is unusable (ev'ry part's unusable)
In its own way (oh-oh, in its own way)
Completely busted
You'll have to get it replaced

These cracks right there? From the chuck down the stairs
That you told me that you did
And I think I've found the source of the sound
That grinds on: this knife within
Come on, man, put two and two together now
You're the one who's to blame, that's right
Which means even if I could fix this lump of shite, my friend
The warranty's voided tonight

Look, that old thing's unusable
Dead as the grave
You didn't treat it very nice
So it's passed on, it's had its day, ah, you plain messed up
It's way beyond "usable" (so far beyond "usable")
Throw it away (oh-oh, chuck it away)
After I've legged it
In case it bursts into flames, it just might
That old thing's unusable (that old thing's unusable)
I'm on my way (oh-oh, I'm on my way)
To help people who are bright