Since I was a kid I had longed for the sea.
Then I started sailin' the drink,
Never thinkin' that I would need help.
I had set off by myself, seafarin' alone.
But before long I screamed for aid on my cell phone.

"Aid me!" what I yell to you.
Does my distress call come through?
There's no isle near here that I can swim to.

As I whine I'm thinkin', "It is not springtime
Or a site for pagan rites. . .no Commies in this clime."
So please tell me,
When I seek help on the sea I should intone
"Mayday!" in November; it seems this is wrong.
But then once again my plea:

"Aid me!" I yell till I'm blue.
Does my distress call come through?
It is miles, maybe longer, to dry you.

(hornpipe interlude)

Yell now:
"Aid me!" Swells on the deep blue.
Does my distress call come through?
While I sink, my lexicon I swim through.

In the damp dictionary I see "Mayday!"
Is just an Anglicization of the French phrase "M'aidez!"
Which means "Help me!"
It was coined somewhere around 1930
For pilots in trouble or those on the sea
Sinkin' in the drink--me, e.g.!

"Aid me!" I bellow to you.
Does my distress call come through?
Can't scan sky, my sextant is soppin',
Sextant's soppin' too.

Hey, now,
"Aid me!" My yelling's now crude.
Does distress call come through, dude?
I'll cry long as my lungs aren't brine-imbued.

Callin', "Save me from this tub! Can't you?!"
Bawlin', "Save me from this tub! Can't you?!"
I see on page 5-5-2: "the deep,"
Synonym for "the sea" since '02.*


*Actually, first documented use, according to the OED, 1000.