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Song Parodies -> "Tooth Bitin' Decay"

Original Song Title:

"Slip Slidin' Away"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Paul Simon

Parody Song Title:

"Tooth Bitin' Decay"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Reading some of these parodies is like pulling teeth. I know, I just had three yanked. Not to be confused with the Yanks taking three straight, which I've also seen recently. Anybody says "Drugs are bad," I got one word for ya: "Vicodin!" That's some good stuff. If you use it like the bottle says.
Tooth bitin' decay. Tooth bitin' decay.
You know it won't help our digestion
with more of tooth bitin' decay.

I know a man. He came from my home town.
He had to go to the dentist to replace a crown.
He said, "Doc Hirschhorn, I live in fear
if I ignore my teeth much longer
I'm afraid that they might disappear."

Tooth bitin' decay. Tooth bitin' decay.
You know it won't help our digestion
with more of tooth bitin' decay.

I know a woman. Became a wife.
These are the very words she uses to describe her life:
She says, "A good day ain't got no pain."
She says, "A bad day is when I gotta get a root canal again."

Tooth bitin' decay. Tooth bitin' decay.
You know it won't help our digestion
with more of tooth bitin' decay.

And I know a father who had a son.
He tried to tell him why gettin' dentures is what he done.
He went a long way to explain.
Kissed his boy as he lay sleepin'
then put his teeth away again.

Tooth bitin' decay. Tooth bitin' decay.
You know it won't help our digestion
with more of tooth bitin' decay.

God only knows. God makes His plan.
But not enough brushin' from the mortal man.
We work our jobs, collect our pay
and hope insurance holds out
for when we've got the tooth bitin' decay.

Tooth bitin' decay. Tooth bitin' decay.
You know it won't help our digestion
with more of tooth bitin' decay.
Tooth bitin' decay. Tooth bitin' decay.
You know it won't help our digestion
with more of tooth bitin' decay.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   1
 1
 1
 

User Comments

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Royce Miller - July 22, 2003 - Report this comment
Michael-this is a great parody
John Jenkins - July 23, 2003 - Report this comment
Michael - thank you for not turning your parody into a diatribe about the need for universal dental insurance.
Guy DiRito - July 23, 2003 - Report this comment
Amen - What John said. And fluoridated water is a commie plot. :)
Michael Pacholek - July 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Where's Chad Mitchell when you need him?
Meriadoc - July 25, 2003 - Report this comment
But remember Michael, chewin' with three ain't bad.
Paul Robinson - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Michael, More straight-on tooth-telling here. 5-5-5.
Michael Pacholek - March 23, 2004 - Report this comment
And nothing but the tooth.
Rick C - May 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Read this a couple of years after you wrote it. Good stuff, MP! 5s

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