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Song Parodies -> "Quite A Spiteful Night"

Original Song Title:

"Blinded By The Light"

Original Performer:

Manfred Mann's Earth Band

Parody Song Title:

"Quite A Spiteful Night"

Parody Written by:

Stuart McArthur

The Lyrics

Dear Mama - I'm afraid I've betrayed the trust of those stupider than myself, but please let me explain.....................Youtube of the full version of the Original Song here

I'd been hired to hype
a fundraising do, set up to help the homeless plight
I thought I'd invite
a hundred and two celebs and umpteen socialites
Wined and dined all night,
their touchiness grew, so it was not a pretty sight

Bab's band's drummer tried to injure Suzanne Somers when she leaned on his hi-hat
then that dork to whom Mork in every episode would talk, asked Mindy "Why so fat?"
In the morning there'd been warnings - seeeemed it could get stormy - some shit was sure to go down
the celebs were all needling, greasing and sleazing, and the night would soon get outa hand

wasn't quite the event that I planned

Because of
Mike Moore's appetite
the cupcakes vamoosed before the other guests arrived
Michael Tyson sly
-ly trumpeted to...Evander "Did you get a bite?"
Likewise out of spite
Ms Lopez refused to let Ben's girlfriend "Out Of Sight"
Irate, Ben replied
engulfing her hooters with a shaken can of Sprite

Some silly big sister of Denise Richards dissed her - coz she once loved Melrose Place
"She said I gave you that, sister, coz you once snogged...
Heather's man. You're a big disgrace"
and loco Yoko was checkin' out the toilet bowl to try to get some shit on Paul
and Angelina earnestly told magazines and journos she "doesn't love her daddy at all"

ALL before we opened the doors!

I'm thinking
"Crikey, in hindsight,
it mighta been wise to televise by satellite.
Primetime dynamite!"

In this town paparazzi pay up when the celebs are impolite
I thought I'll tape 'em
...on the sly


oh Mama! I know it's cunning
but Mama! It's kinda funny!
Mama always told me not to try to make a fool of someone...
but Mama...
think of the money!


There's cheek-bone-lifted Joan
Rivers taunting Sharon Stone: "Darling...cross your legs!
and then Rosie O...Donnell's comb...she ran over Donald's dome, to see if she could find quail eggs
eminem and...Moby then...traded blows til 10am (neither of them did much harm)
Tonya Hardin'...yet again...knee-whacked Nancy Kerrigan, and blamed it on HER bodyguard

and then Nancy called Tonya a tart

and then the
strike before midnight
a drunken Tom Cruise told Mel he liked the Israelites
Mel then impolite
-ly told Tom he goosed young Katie on a Qantas flight
Katie then replied
that Mel should abuse himself (a la hermaphrodites)
Slyly Mel enquired
"so Kate is it TRUE that Tom has never been inside?"

whilst off to the right
Kate Moss and Sienna Miller got into a fight
quite not what you might
call ladylike - lest they're making "LADY" gelignite
Spiked the fahrenheit
of males at their tables who got way over-excited
Frightened, Kate then tried
to run off and hide except her nostrils were too wide
By that time, outside
Naomi and Tyra were debating who's less white
Tyra spied a pie

I ducked down
but my camera got crunched
and then the Food Fight...

Cops arrived

.......and (cork pops) after 3 years of trying I've completed The Big Seven!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 26

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   26

User Comments

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Red Ant - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
"...Donald's dome, to see if she could find quail eggs": *cleans up Cheerios from keyboard* LMAO! Excellent work with all the title line subs throughout and for catching all that rap-like internal rhyming. This must have been a bastard to do, but you've done it in style.Congrats on making parodies of all of the big 7. Big 5s.
Guy - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Boy you got all the scoop on all the poop rolled up into little smelly balls
And your manager's sister showed you her cold blister in a center fold show all.

Great BBTL - hope you didn't mind me singing along. I still need to get one of these out for my portfolio. Quite enjoyable and finely executed. Blind triple fives.
Jack Wilson - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM! SOTM! Loved it! 5s
Ann Hammond - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
my favorite today
McKludge - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
But I thought everyone was everyone else's friend in Hollywood! Great stuff here. And I learned a new word today "gelignite"
alvin - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
my favorite of the day...wonderfully surreal and a nice job on an impossile tune to pace
Guy - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
I wonder McKludge is gelignite anything like vegamite?
AFW - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
What RA said...fantastic parody writing job
project sisyphus - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Nice work! Not an easy song either.
stuart mcarthur - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks Jack - "bastard" isn't the half of it, as everyone seems to say - now I know why it took me so long to get around to - just had to keep rewriting it and rewriting it - happy with it now though :-)

thanks Guy - I'm amazed you haven't done this in your extensive catalogue - looking forward to it

thanks Jack! - and thanks Ann :-)

thanks McKludge - what, you don't have gelignite over there? - you mean we Aussies have our very own national explosive - like vegemite?? - wow, cool

thanks alvin - yes, the pacing in this OS takes no prisoners :-(

thanks AFW :-)
MrMacphisto - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
This must've taken quite a while to write... good stuff... 5-5-5
John Jenkins - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
"Evander "Did you get a bite?" might have been the best line, but this had excellent rhyming and humor from start to finish. Can't wait for the video. Congrats on making the Big 7!!! I've got 3 to go and now that you have set the BBTL bar this high, I don't think I'm ever going to do this one.
stuart mcarthur - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks project sisyphus (that name needs an explanation! :-))

thanks MrMac and thanks JJ - that means that between us we'll never be doing another BBTL;-)
Kristof Robertson - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Yeah, this is OK, I guess....;-) Seriously, this is superb, Stu; another example of what you do best: the celeb roast. Frantic creative rhyming, perfect pacing, and towering humour. If this is your SOTM entry, it's going to be hard to beat. Bravo! 555+++
Phil Alexander - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Like, er... wow. Reading this brought back memories- great idea, and very well kept going througout.
stuart mcarthur - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
whoa, that's a treat - Kristof AND Phil! - thanks to you two guys who definitely KNOW the process, from having already tamed this bucking bronco OS - which makes me all the more grateful for your comments :-)
TJC - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Soaring creativity and absolutely unpredictable rhymes/juxtapositions... perfection!
Guy - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Quote and (cork pops) after 3 years of trying I've completed The Big Seven! unquote

Stu - Could you please list the big seven? I took your challenge and just completed a BBTL. I'd just like to know what I may still need to write in order to pop that cork. Anyone know what they are?
stuart mcarthur - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
wow, that was quick, Guy - beat my effort by around 50 days.....

this link will take you to the discussion

but to save time, and for anyone else out there who doesn't visit the MB and might be interested(eg TJC, Tommy Turtle, alvin, AFW, JAB, etc) the Big 7 are...

American Pie
Bohemian Rhapsody
Blinded By The Light
Be Our Guest
The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald
I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General

The five members of the club so far (who have declared themselves) are Spaff, Kristof Robertson, Ethan Mawyer, Phil Alexander and as of yesterday, Stuart McArthur

I'm sure there are more, so please out yourself here anybody else who has done them all :-)
Guy - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Stu - I guess I better start thinking of "Be Our Guest" I've done the rest, well until "Blinded By The Bytes" publishes, It has been submitted and should publish tomorrow. I remember Claud Prez doing Pee Our Cup. Best ever I think of `Be Our Guest`. Where is old Claude?

BBTL seemed quite easy once I got started on it. I spent no more than 3 hours drafting, refining, and editing. I was surprised unlike MG which took me 3 days. 6 down 1 to go. Thanks again.
Guy - November 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Stu - I have a rough draft of `Be Our Guest` - It should be out Mon or Tues. I'm up for adding another to this list. Marty Robbins` "El Paso` definately qualifies for one of the tougher ones to do. Anyway I will apply for magnificent 7 membership when the song is published.
stuart mcarthur - November 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Guy - on the various MB "Big 7" threads, there have been many worthy suggestions of parodies that, for some amiright reason or the other, could be added to the list, such as My Favourite Things, 50 ways, I've Been Everywhere, Boulevarde Of BD, We Didn't Start The Fire, Do Re Mi, Simply Irresistible, and I personally think Somethin Stupid would be good, but the Big 7 (as nominated by JD) has stood the test of time, and it seems each of its members has better claims for inclusion than any of these challengers, worthy though they all are. There is also a sense of romance about The Big 7, where its sheer constancy accords it even more cred. There was once a suggestion of a "Next 7" which I think would be a good idea, but I'm all for leaving the Big 7 alone, so that it can grow in stature - amiright thrives on, and is all the better for this sort of mythical and traditional stuff ;-).......and whoa, freak out, my security code is MB7
Guy - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Stu - I did not know the history behind the "Big 7". Now I do and you are correct to say to leave it as it is. I'll be claiming membership today when my "Be Our Guest" parody gets posted. It is a downright proud amiright tradition. Thanks.
Smeg And The Heads - December 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Peter Andersson - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM = Society (gathering) Of The Month (in more ways than one it seems).
Max Power - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
littlecupCakes - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
555 for you, General MacArthur! Very fine Parody indeed, Sir! and thanks for the reference on cupcakes, I guess you call them that too, in the land Down Udder.
Agrimorfee - December 20, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wowsers, I've read many a BBtL parody, but this one left me breathless! Good job.
Matthias - December 20, 2007 - Report this comment
-Originality (A): You seriously are the king of the tabliods and this parody shows it. The fact that put a celeberity ball into words with amazing skill was something that only a true veteran could do. Fantastic job! -Pacing: (A): Although you didn't do the whole thing at the end of the song where they like combine the entire thing into one huge mess, I'm glad, because as you can tell from the way I described it, I don't like the way the original song does that. -Comedy: (A): You gave the beat down on so many celeberities who're currantly in the news and tabloids, and I don't think you missed a hit. This was like combining 10 of your best works about celeberties and talently putting them into a blender and turning it on frappe'. -Overall (A): This has to be one of your best works, and since almost all of your work is close to your best work this really takes the cake, and feeds it to Rosie O Donnell.
Guy - December 23, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM-NOV) Stu - Once again congrats on your Big 7 induction with this song. I learned about the Big 7 through your top comments and went on to write both BOG and BBTL to follow in behind you. I decided that one of those two would go for SOTM. I thought I'd run mine against Kristof event though I wanted to enter my BBTL. But 53 days working on this? I didn't have the heart to go up against you. Good luck with this comp Stu. I'll bump heads with Kristof. =:-)
Smeg And the Heads - December 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Comment above ... that one word sums it up ...
Jason - December 27, 2007 - Report this comment
bobpiecheese - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) And Stu completes the Big 7. Did he balls it up? No! He completed it with style and extra lashings of awesome-sauce! Now I wanna do it (and that means redoing my shoddy attempts at the 4 that I have done).
Below Average Dave ( - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I still don't fully understand how the "Big 7" as they are called were chosen. . .though this song is clearly a difficult challenge. . .I have a feeling I'll be seeing this again in a few months in a little ABC round known as Q
Mikey Squirrel - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM- This was really funny and well done, Stu. Congrats on completing the big 7! (Myself, I only have 2)
Kristof Robertson - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM)As I alluded to before, this is a TOWER of a parody,'ve pretty much claimed this topic area as your own, and I can't see this not winning a medal. Just....effing brilliant.
Phil Alexander - December 31, 2007 - Report this comment
I've revisited the OS recently, as if I were to do it again I'd have the big 7 twice over... but of the few ideas I've had, none really have enough to keep going through the song - this is still a great example of how it should be done.
Jeff Reuben - December 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Wow, awesome job on a very difficult song. Liked the Sharon Stone line in particular :)
Jack Wilson - December 31, 2007 - Report this comment
See above, I think this will win
Matthias - March 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Seriously the most epic of the Big 7. This is a song that I still struggle with and is probably in the Top Rung of even mine and Dave's Epic 40. This was a great, great parody and is surely going to get some points from me for SOTY.
Jason - April 18, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC-Q) Superb effort. Echo most of the above comments.
Guy - April 20, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4-Q) It is you I must thank for putting me onto the big 7 and making me write parody to some very difficult OS. I have already commented on this several times and I re-read it today. It gets better with age, sir.
Red Ant - April 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Not too soon to see this one again, Stu. I only gave this one point in SOTM, because despite it being quite funny, you kinda petered out in the final stretch, leaving out all the overlayed vocal as well as the verse that starts "Now Scott with a slingshot...". Perhaps I placed too much emphasis before on completeness, because revisiting this one makes me realize performing this live, solo would mean only being able to sing the lyrics you have - no more, no less. This will place high in the Q round with me.
Matthias - April 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Very impressive peice of parody Stu. I'm not as picky as Red Ant on this one, because this song is VERY difficult to master, and not many have. I think Spaff's the only one I can think of, although you did a really excellent job on this, and no wonder it did so well in SOTM. (I'm still struggling coming up with a great idea for this)/
Agrimorfee - April 22, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) Here we are again, Stu! Once again, if it hasn't been made clear, the clever idea combined with the OTM satire is what makes this BBtL stand out, in spite of the missing coda.
Below Average Dave - April 29, 2008 - Report this comment
I do believe I said I'd see this again in the Q round, I don't have anything to add to my original opinion except that this was a masterful write.
Invisible Boy - April 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Now THATS how it's done. With all the comments already, I'm out of superlatives.
Of course TMGLTM...but for some reason your placement of the word "vamoosed" made me LOL...Super... super...super

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